to begin with

Yesterday, I went to Raffles Hotel, after work, to purchase their chocolates from the chocolaterie at ThosSB inside the ground floor.

When I worked there as an intern about 7 years ago, the people were very kind to me and I could take a chocolate a day! I loved the ones of candied orange peel coated with chocolate, the tart taste of orange peel combined with the melty richness of chocolate reminded me of the happy days working there. I felt happy to be working my internship with a prestigious company like Raffles Holdings - although now the hotel is under Fairmont or something. The Boyfriend and I also love the courtyard, how nice if we can hold some party or celebration there! The chocolates have exotic-local flavors like lychee, jasmine tea, one of my favorites, the szechuan pepper... another unique flavor, which is lovely! I bought a box for The Boyfriend as a graduation gift of sorts - he had his convocation yesterday.

The person at the counter said he remembered me, remembered my face. Have I changed that little? I was in my teens when I interned there. Yet, he distinctly remembered me (though I can't!!!) Walter was really happy to see me and proud of me when I presented my namecard to him. He also told another guy who worked at the Raffles Shop, Boon Cheng, about me, and together we chatted about the various people that used to work there and where they were, now. I was so touched that he remembers. It's rare these days to find someone who can remember your face. He is one of those who remembers, and that just stirs up a warm feeling in my soul.

I've been busy. Lilo asked me recently, 'Is that all life is about?' Getting attached, married, having kids, looking after them, getting old...
Well I responded that, even if you choose the single path, sometime or other you would still have to babysit your friend's or relatives' kids, haha. Can't escape from that!
But... honestly, I've been wondering too. Life has been good to me, I can still say that. And as Chinese, I think we all have a bit of the greed/dissatisfaction inside of us.

The wanting to create something for yourself, the ambituous part. I'm not ambituous, but on the other hand, I will not work in a job which requires me to do things I don't like, either. I've been hooked on reading china netizens articles on chinasmack.com. It helps me to understand - and yet, not understand their mentality. They dump all their waste products into their famous rivers, like the 'Li River', till it is murky brown. I feel that this is a really selfish mentality. And in a country of 1 billion people, all of them are wanting to achieve more for themselves, pushing to selfish and unfriendly behavior. They don't mind being mistresses or kept women, for money. This may seem like they have no morals. But, if we have lived in poverty, each day worrying about our sustenance, might we have chosen this route as well? They all claim to lead harsh lives as farmers. But doesn't Japan or even Europe have lots of farmers, and they seem happy? I feel that being happy is a choice. Sure, the weather here is horrid, but we are not freezing to death...

Definitely, being exposed to the retail environment here, the shopping-mentality still overtakes us. If say we live in Malaysia, I don't think we have so many choices, thus, we will be happier and more satisfied with the things we buy. Especially if it takes us 2 hours to reach the nearest shopping centre... ... and we can only shop once a month due to our limited budget. But in Singapore, it seems like no matter how much you earn, it is never enough...

I've been teaching tuition this month for English O'levels, I do enjoy it though it gets rather tedious and tiring... I'm going to see if I am able to teach English for a class next month round, night classes and this brings me quite a substantial income. I want to pay off all my debts and buy things like a digital camera, new handphone... all those things which we think we need in this consumerist society. Too many people laughing at my dinosaur handphone... ...So I hope this all turns out well, I shall be the most hardworking person in town.