I still need a best friend

It's really tough having my good friends away; the ones that I only tell my secret fears to. It suddenly dawned on me that I have an isolationist policy. Oh well it beats having your innermost thoughts being intentionally spilled out onto the next victim of whoever happens to pick up your call/reply to your sms at the moment. I don't make fair-weather friends, in fact I dispose of them like the wind. Never will I trust those, who only call you when they need you and when you need them they are always busy. Self centred freaks that cannot control their impulses. Some friends are not worth the heartache for. I just don't think it's worth my time, even though Boon tried to reconcile with me (So what if it's CNY...) I just brusquely replied, Hey, don't think it's CNY you can reconcile with me (with a sardonic smile on my face) go and write a reflections paper on all you've done! He slunked away with his tail in his knees... I'm still waiting for him to say sorry to me which he never will. So too bad. It just shows the character of the person which is known to all but himself. Bad memories aside, even though I don't talk about Mr BestFriend doesn't mean I don't care. Or I don't miss him (in a very platonic sense.) Maybe somethings are taking up my time and energy so much that I put him in a small cupboard, neglected for a while... I should be like Deb, she has the old photos of us doing crazy things pasted on her wardrobe side - I was pleasantly surprised by that... and she also kept all the christmas presents that I made through the years (Last year I stopped making them.) Her mum could even recognize me through the photos! So touched.


So when I'm feeling hurt, who do I go to?

It's good to know that my dependence is still on God. Even though sometimes I still need a best friend.