Caught up with some friends and over a lazy Sunday brunch, we enquired about our mutual friends and how they were faring. Our thoughts were with a couple whom we all knew. All of us believed that they were the ‘type’ that would settle down fast, having attended marriage preparation classes, and looking stable and secure in their relationship. So we were concerned when it seemed that things were not rosy. After all, in previous years past, they had broken up for a year’s duration and then reconciled again. During that year, I saw that there were a few girls who were attracted to him. He could have easily gone out and started something with any one of them. But he kept them at arm’s length and waited.
This guy is so patient, my friend remarked. And it was as if everything was illuminated there and then. So many times, we have speculated, wondered, questioned this guy. Why is he hanging on when there could be someone out there who would make him very happy? Why does the romantic prognosis seem so bleak?
So many times, I forget. That Love is patient. Out of the million and one things I can say about love, about relationships, about each other, about our feelings, and thoughts, and daydreams… we forget sometimes, that we need to wait, or learn how to wait.
After a year of not being together before reconciliation, we thought that their issues had been settled. Apparently the lady wanted the guy to take the lead, in many ways; however, his personality is more of the laid-back type and he was not able to change himself for her sake, as hard as he tried.
I thought to myself, if I loved the guy, I wouldn’t want him to change. Isn’t that a farcical love? If I love you, I would tell you, to be yourself. To stay the same. I would love you the way you are. As idealistic as it sounds. Because it was you I fell in love with, was happy with, cherished moments with.
Isn’t his love for her like the penguin, who waits for his mate to come back from the frozen lands, waiting, watching, hoping…
The penguin can wait, for a hundred days, for his mate. He waits for a hundred days without eating. Starving. Love is patient. He waits, for her return.
The girl penguin knows the guy penguin loves her by his gift of pebbles. The nests are built by pebbles. And when the guy penguin gives the girl pebbles, she knows he is serious about her.
When a penguin finds its mate, they stay together forever.
Love is patient indeed.
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