this time round

It says a lot, I think, about the things we remember or choose not to forget.

And these days I find myself waking up with a smile on my face, despite really stressful days. For those who have shared my days, they have no idea how much it means to me. Those who bothered - Jelly tried his bestest to bring me out for a good time during those worst weeks, I said to him that I really hope he can find someone special. I know he has trouble in that department, and I long for the day where it will be easy for him. I'll always remember those generous gestures. There are others, of course. The friend who spent valentines with me. The lady who always kept in touch with words of courage and never asked for anything in return. The penpal who attended one month of church with me. And the boy who attended the next month, ensuring that at my lowest depths of misery, my soul was still fed.

I've always been thankful for the people God has placed in my life. Sure, there may be a thousand and one worries and hopes and daydreams in a woman's mind, but I shall not try to do things in my own wilful nature, as I'm so prone to, and even, expected to - but let's not negate the fact that without sounding over-spiritual, there is a purpose and reason to everything, and perhaps in time to come we will all know exactly why these all transpires.

For now, though I dearly wish to know what the future holds for all of us, may this desire not force me to forget the beauty of the moment, the gift of the present. And the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me; was when I, unexpectedly brimming with tears, and really embarassed; was to gingerly, gently, stroke my hair and put his arm around me. He's a real sweetheart and any girl would be so lucky to have his love.