Saturday, August 06, 2011

associated content: appearances and exposes

The days are getting darker in The Office. I'm literally sick to my stomach to see the colleagues being hired and fired one after another. Yes, I knew about the high attrition rate all over this industry. Still, I never expected such dark days to befall us. Especially when I'm now the last one in, if they practice the 'last in first out' policy then I have to start packing my bags and weighing my options. Already the walls seem to be closing in. I still get headhunted calls quite often, but I just dread to leave to a similar place. I don't want to go on and on about how miserable it is, but I'm starting to realize I've made the wrong decision.

As the Aussie from Sydney (M.) told me, 'the really brilliant ones don't stay for long', those words spoken at the right time gave me the conviction to be proactive about the opportunities that present themselves. Living daily under the fear of termination should you not have any closures, one month, is just not a way to live nor a good career. I consider myself blessed to have 2 candidates in the running for senior positions; and brought in some top-notch deals as well, but should they not materialize, the sinking feeling of chasing after a moving target would leave me filled with dread.

We have embarked on an unusual friendship of sorts, M. and me.

As he works in one of the buildings along my one-way street that touches tanjong pagar to raffles place, I've spotted him along this road, once each week in the last 2 weeks. I hope he doesn't think I'm stalking him. He always asks after me and wants to know what I'm doing over the weekend. And he would share his, too. We would be ironing or feeding our pets or inebriated (not me) or doing laundry or going to the gym. I'm such a girl to treasure the little silly things like these. Appearances can be deceiving and honestly I had never thought he'd have this sort of side to him, him looking every bit the man about town, grinning broadly in every photo that could be found of him, and so sporty that he has broken all his toes before (as he shared) and even plays for singapore in one of the leagues! He shared that to me shyly, almost in a whisper, as we were making our way back to our respective offices, 'I play for the Singapore Rugby League'. I smiled to myself all the way back. Most chaps would just huffily state their sporting achievements and expect women to swoon all over them, but the way he said it was almost as if he was afraid I would disapprove.

I think he was rather disappointed when I said with a deadpan expression that until then I did not know Singapore had a rugby team ... really! I had no idea!

I hope to support the game as he mentioned it would be his last as he felt that he was getting too old for it. And as long as we're on the same street, busy as we are, I hope there will always be a place to share the little things that often goes unnoticed. I never imagined to see this side of such a guy, and it gives me hope that there are people like this who exist out there. I'm not being overly-romantic, but it's hard to find in this day and age, someone who slowly wants to get to know you, as a friend, and you'll be assured of his help, in any way he can.