Hope for a good thing to happen; and about liking someone

It's the heart afraid of breaking,
that never learns to dance.

It's the dream- afraid of waking
that never takes the chance.

It's the one who won't be taken,
who cannot seem to give,

And the soul afraid of dying,
that never learns to live.

-Bette Midler, The Rose

I told Sheepy yesterday over sms, "It's a matter of choosing whether or not to like someone; and in doing so, making it a part of your destiny."

Wished he understood that in a way that I wanted him, and everyone else, to. To understand that many things in life is futile; that hearts can be broken -but in naivete, mended, again. Being open to others does not lower your standing, you gain, from the other's openness too. Enigmatically I open myself up, only to those, who are open,too. So they perceive me as being open but, they are the open ones as well. It feels good to have a buddy share with you things they do not share with others, it makes me feel special that they have chosen, for this moment in time, to just share a little about themselves.

And for those I like, I remember. Every little thing. It's a part of my subconscious that wants to be playing a role, however unimportant, in their lives. That makes me want to hear, and hearing, seek to understand the person behind the facade, the mind beyond the visuals, to understand ... the soul of the person. Hopefully, someone will want to understand me in this same way too, that the way I think would be as intriguing to him as to me, because we share a dream, for ourselves, for our future...I hope, not because it is a dreamy, idealistic thing to do... but because it is necessary for me, for my dreams, to survive.


I need finances. I know it is a testing of faith for me.... a real stretching of it for these few months! I see possibilities, yes, and I believe all will work out. But for now, it's the time of just gingerly stepping into the waters, and letting God lead from there. I've just been allocated a slot for December's Aceh trip. I have no clue how to raise the $600 before this weekend, to go. It would be awfully devastating for me should the chance pass me by, just because of the financing issue. I need an answer for this, quickly... For now, I'm still in hope. Going to pray, for a miracle. =)