The topics of adults most often veer towards love, especially those who are hoping and seeking. Then, what else can we talk about, right?
But it seems that everyone has been offering me (unsolicited) advice also, almost to the effect that I feel that everyone is inundated with thoughts of love, love, love. Is that all we can think about and all we can speak about? Perhaps that's why the tabloid reports of new/scandalous romances always sell so well.
"Have I ever considered X.... (friend of mine who happened to be hovering nearby)"
"Any updates? *winkss (when said friend is standing next to me)"
It seems a miracle to me that we can remain good friends when we have such friends to 'help' us.
Of course I'm sure they meant well and who asked him to be single for so long...
I do wish that all the questions would stop, though. I mean, I feel it is rather insensitive to both me and said hapless male friend who happened to be by my side/accompany me for dining events.
It would be callous of me to start anything at this point of time. Would people prefer then that I am still sobbing alone? It seems to be a crime to be happy, but I do need to have some cheer after the gloom and doom of yesteryear.
Not only should the looming question be, 'have I recovered from the past love event...'; instead of 'is there any guy I'm interested in'... I do wish people would focus on the fact that there are good friends who are helping me through this instead of doubting their/our intentions.
Of course, mostly everyone wants to settle down one day, but it seems that most singles have close-fisted mindsets. In a nutshell, not everyone is open to consider several possibilities to mingle or even to know more random people of the opposite gender. To each his own, I say. If we do not wish to choose to mingle, then we should not condone those who went offshore fishing in search of his true love. For those who only have same friends of the same gender, they should not condone us who are 'ladies' man; or me, the opposite of ladies' man... For we just happen to be successful and awesome in making friendships with the opposite gender, not that we purposely choose to do so or do so for selfish reasons. It just IS.
I know they (all the single ladies, all the single ladies) just-don't-get-it but if you seriously think about it, if I choose to unwisely have romantic notions about my male pals, then, through the years, I would be left with very few friends, wouldn't I?
In fact, I have many female friends too, just that they like to keep a low profile in our friendship, hee hee...am so touched that they will call me and ask me out to cheer me up as well...
For the record, the only thing that is happening is happening in unwise romantic notions in other womens' minds. I have been kept sane by the writings of Elisabeth Elliot and other spiritual writers and I suggest they do the same while waiting for their prince charming. Life doesn't need to be all about love. Sometimes we need to focus on growing and learning and being a better self. I read somewhere, 'don't be a woman who needs a man. be a woman a man needs.' It stuck with me for a long time.
Likewise, I gave my male friend this advice: Don't choose someone you can live with, choose someone you can't live without.
And I think my single-lady godly friend gave me the best advice of all. She told me, he will come when it's time. It's that simple. It just IS.
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