Showing posts with label men. Show all posts
Showing posts with label men. Show all posts

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Men.

Some observations about men.

Men. We love them, hate them, try to understand them, try to make them understand us.

The men in my life have always had an enduring fascination with women. ‘What do you girls talk about?’ And why do we like to ‘go shopping’ so much? I guess these are some of the questions on their mind. And perhaps being the only answer key to the multitude of questions left unsolved and unanswered, they probed, albeit on the surface, about a women’s mystery.

Women talk about the same things as men. We talk about men, the same way men, invariably talk about women, though in a different context.

We talk about our fears, and desires, and being woman – and born with what you men call,  ‘a woman’s intuition’, we sense more than what is being said. Our girlfriends may talk about how much she fancies a chap we all know, but somehow, perhaps in a glimpse, a moment when she looks away momentarily, with a bewildered and disheartening look; we manage to catch the look that means, yes, I do like him immensely, but I also know that we are not meant to be. And we do. Not. Ask. But offer the friendship, and the listening ear when the time comes when she must move on.

And in all my conversations with the men in my life, I’m truly bewildered at how men fear women. We are the weaker sex, easily overpowered by men, with a far wider range of things to worry about, then them. We have health and hormonal issues, women get headaches twice the frequency (and intensity, I believe!)more so then the male gender, we have to worry about our skin, our hair, our body, more so than men, because whether we like it or not, we are more often, judged by our appearances than what is inside. So being already judged for being superficial, we also judge those around us who seem less put-together. And we are hormonally conditioned to like men who seem to be able to have the right criteria (Criteria depends from woman to woman) to be able to take care of us.

Men are clueless when it comes to the ways of women. So they are scared when they make women cry, or make them angry. They don’t know what to do. Keep asking’ Are you alright’ doesn’t help one single bit. Nor does avoiding the situation entirely. But men do not know the variables when a women cries. It could be that she is regretting being with him, and thinking of and not being able to forget her first love. And having these wretched feelings, she cries, or is angry, with herself and the world. But you won’t know that, because these are things that will remain unspoken of. It could be a stressful and hormonal period of time in her life/that month, and even speaking of it, explaining it to him, he wouldn’t be able to understand, and perhaps it would be better if he remained clueless. It could be that simply, women cry easily. Because after that, we feel much better than keeping it all in, like men.  

Men fear that they become unattractive (Or never were attractive!!!) to women. Even though they stick to their boring old polo tees(for years, as if there were an ongoing competition!), you can hear them muttering to themselves about their burgeoning belly, even though they don’t seem to want to eat less or exercise more. And even pat each others’ bellies, supposedly as a sign of brotherly affection when it means a slightly sinister gloating at their comrade’s sign of ageing. All men have this sinister fear. Even those who are hunky and look dashing, all the other guys would admire their tight body, sexy back and handsome face, inside, they are afraid of not appearing attractive or desirable to women, too!



Some try to impress by becoming a Mr Know-it- all, offering up pieces of advice or showcasing their adept skills at something. Like blabbering on about the latest news or the newest movie/book/hot scandal. However, this often misfires as women are not as impressed as they think women would be.

Some act nonchalant, not seeming to care about the state of their polo tees or their belly.

Perhaps being more optimistic, they think that, surely, after some time, some beauty would be able to acknowledge their vast charms, and want to swim in the deep sea of their eyes. But as the years go on, they start to have a sinking feeling that the women only see them as ‘woodblocks’, ‘activity partners’, and not desirable in the way they see a man they would like to have by their side. And their deepest fear sees the daylight.

Why do some men play with women’s hearts? They want to make a woman like them. Maybe this is a subconscious thing – perhaps since their childhood days they have never felt love from any woman. And so they ‘woo’ the women in their lives. They appear nice. Sensitive. Very sweet. And always paying – perhaps a need for the women to have a monetary obligation to them, but the women tell themselves he is being a true gentleman. Each date or friendly meeting experience is tinged with the ‘romance feel’. Invariably, the strongest of women will develop feelings. But these men are insecure, worrisome, think too much about their own feelings and usually says things to make them seem nice that women will continue liking them, and not say it because it comes sincerely from the heart.


And most of the things that men do, or act,or feel, is ultimately centred on that. Being desirable, being attractive to women. Or maybe, some are more driven by the fear, of being undesirable, or unattractive to women.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

All about dogs

Ms Cheerful and I have been talking about dogs lately. I've seen and sang to her lovely spaniadors (cocker spaniel + labrador mix) and we realized that the old saying about how your pet will turn out to look like you is true, mostly because you will tend to choose the kind of dog which looks somewhat like you.

(Which lends me to hilarious laughter knowing which dog Mr A once had)

I've always wanted a whippet (if I lived in a meadow) - a pert, dog with woebegone eyes and spindly long legs with short fur. Hee. 

Maybe it's only me who sees a correlation, but here are some characteristics of the men I've known and dated. I shan't name names... ...

Anyways, do take it with a pinch of salt...
Afterall, it may impact the next breed you decide to bring home.

Introducing: 
1. Benjy the Bull Terrier
The Bull Terrier is a good dog that has developed a bad reputation. This dog was created to fight and when a Bull Terrier is mistreated, it can be made into a dog that is quite aggressive, even vicious. With proper care and training, a Bull Terrier puppy can grow up to be a sweet and loving dog. In fact, at times this breed is even slightly silly. However, an older dog who has been mistreated may never be truly trustworthy and should not be placed in a home where it has access to children.

The Bull Terrier loves family life and often is quite good with children. These dogs love to play and will spend hours playing frisbee. However, if you do not have children of your own, and your Bull Terrier isn't used to small children, never leave your Bull Terrier with visiting children unattended, as infants and toddlers are sometimes mistaken for other animals instead of people. 

If you've never owned a dog before, then the Bull Terrier is definitely not for you. These dogs are 
not a good match with inexperienced dog owners. In addition, if you are a shrinking violet instead of an assertive person, your Bull Terrier will sense this. He will quickly dominate you and rule your household.

Since Bull Terriers are such powerful animals, you will need to be sure your dog is thoroughly trained before he gets too big for you to control easily.


Your Bull Terrier needs very little grooming.



2. Pete the Pug
Pugs have a reputation for being so good natured that people can literally walk on them. However, don't let this breed's laid back attitude fool you. This dog will turn from a lover to a fighter in an instant if an intruder threatens his human. Pugs are wonderful with children and other pets. In fact, Pugs have been known to perform feats such as gently carrying an escaped parakeet to his owner without disturbing even a feather. However, Pugs are more likely to cause allergies than some other breeds. 

Pugs are perfectly content to live in apartments or town homes. Although the Pug doesn't require a lot of exercise, you should be sure he stays in shape to keep him healthy. A daily walk around the block should be enough exercise, but he will be happy to walk much further, as well. 

While Pugs can learn obedience, these little guys aren't the fastest learners. Your Pug may not learn to sit or heel as fast as other breeds. However, once he learns he will be extremely proud of himself. You may want to try attending puppy obedience classes with your Pug. If he just can't grasp the commands, try again when he is a few months older. 

Pugs 
love food. They are happy to eat whatever you give them and will learn undignified tricks if you reward them with treats. You should make every effort to limit your Pug's food intake, since these dogs can suffer from knee problems, which grow worse if the dog is overweight. 

If you want a dog breed that does not need much grooming, a Pug is ideal.  

If you want a dog breed that is all heart and you don't mind him snoring and snorting in your ear all night, then a Pug may be the perfect choice for you.

3. Googoo the Golden Retriever


These dogs are high energy animals and need plenty of exercise, especially while they are less than three years of age. This desire to stay busy is one reason that Golden Retrievers make good rescue, Seeing Eye, or drug sniffing dogs. If you do not keep them occupied, they will find ways to amuse themselves, such as eating your entire shoe collection. 

If you are an avid gardener, you will need to be sure you have a separate area where you can contain your dog, since most Golden Retrievers 
love to dig. While they are going through their puppy stage, they are also prone to chewing up shrubs. 

Since Golden Retrievers are large dogs, you may want to consider the cost of food before buying your puppy. These dogs 
eat a lot. 

3. Chris the Collie


The Collie is strong and graceful and has plenty of endurance. This dog's almond shaped eyes seem to sparkle with intelligence, whether they are brown or blue in color. The Collie's prick ears give it an alert appearance.

The Collie 
enjoys living in the midst of an active family. This breed is not a good choice for apartment living, since it loves to spend time outside. A home with a large yard is ideal for the Collie breed. 

Although the Collie is 
friendly and outgoing, this dog is protective of its family and takes its duties as a watchdog seriously. Your Collie will bark at intruders, whether they are people, cats, squirrels, or pieces of trash blowing around the yard. 

The Collie can be 
quite headstrong and can get into quite a lot of mischief as a puppy. You should consider attending puppy obedience classes with your Collie, since it is easier to train a small puppy who hasn't developed bad habits than a sixty pound dog that has. Also, be sure to be firm with your puppy about staying on the floor if you do not want Collie hair on all of your furniture. Once you allow your dog on the furniture, he will feel that he has a right to be there any time you leave the room.

The Collie breed has 
very few health problems. 

Collies are quite happy to pack away plenty of food. These dogs have a 
tendency to overeat, so it is best to give them three small meals a day. If your Collie develops a bulge around his middle, talk to your veterinarian about switching to a food that promotes weight loss. 

Although a rough coated Collie has long hair, the Collie does not need extensive grooming. . 

The Collie is an 
intelligent family dog. If you want a dog who will protect your family and will play with the kids, the Collie may just be the perfect pet for you.

-

Well, I'm still doing some research on the type I wanna bring home.
Maybe I've already found him although he doesn't know it yet. *wails*

When a man likes a woman, it's easy. He just needs to go 'wow!' at the way she walks into his gaze, and basically, give or take a few things, like, is she single... do I like her... that's it. 

When a woman likes a man, it is much more complicated. Men will never understand a woman's psyche/mind.
She thinks:
Why would I like this guy?
I must list down all the things I like about this guy and see if it's a legit liking.
I must ask my trusted friends for their opinion about this guy, and if they don't like him, I will... trust their opinions (yeah right)
Why am I asking my friends about this guy, do I truly like him?
Gasp! Do I love him?
Do I want his babies?
Is he single?
Is he single and not liking anyone?
Is he single, not liking anyone, and has no emotional baggage?
Is he single, not liking anyone, has no emotional baggage and only want to settle down when his career is stable?
Can I envision a future with him?
Can I envision a relationship with him?
Can I envision a date with him?
Can I envision a chat with him???
Who is that girl sitting next to him?
What if we have no chemistry?
What if he finds me boring?
What if I find him boring?
Does he like kids?
Does he like to exercise?
Does he like to eat at hawker centres?
Does he like to watch movies?...
etc.

Well, of course, somehow, the intended will seemingly fit into those questions like the way a pet fits into your life... ... but the endless questioning is something which only (lovesick) women can fathom to do, and that, is why we are not men.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Observe...

Now I know why they call it retail therapy!

Having done shopping as 'homework' most of my tertiary life, I really shudder from spending hours in malls, shopping - especially for clothes... besides our retail scene isn't much in those days, just the usual lookalike brands and whatnot. Shop like a man - I usually key in what I need to buy on Palmer and then shop for it. Shopping to me is a waste of time, and usually stressful with hordes of people blocking your way to things. But feeling down recently, I decided to stop work in the early afternoon and shop before my appointment later in the evening - I had to get some new, new year's clothes anyways. Plus my work clothes were getting rather shabby. So I went to Bugis after much consideration, knowing that the other places would not really suit my fancy. Voila! There was a nice shop - I had wandered in previously, liking the interior design... and found some knitwear tops to my liking. And...they were having a SALE! I like sales! Especially when... I only buy clothes that are on SALE.

And all the colors and styles suited me to a tee...Bought 3 items at 30-50% off, quite delighted they still had new pieces in my size. If you wait till it's 70%, usually it's the last piece or worse, only L/XL sizes. Felt really fulfilled after that, it's like an epiphany knowing how certain women feel, after buying an item they so desire... and at a good price too! Been seeing some good buys around recently. Apart from this purchase, last week I also got 2 new dresses - one more casual and one for work...As well as a red striped blouse with flowy sleeves which I'd probably sell/throw after the stripe season is over. It's dirt cheap anyways, and the material is nice, almost cotton lycra-ish. Now I'm quite a fan of the brand which I bought. Something like gg5 cutting and pricing, but less common. So far I only saw 2 shops -one near The Office which sells a range of shoes too. I think it might be a spinoff brand of gg5 or ness as their colors and buttons covered in cloth look similar. It's more mature and less knitwear compared to ness anyways. Cool, I like... am anticipating next week where I'd shop at the places I'd be travelling to. At this rate, I think I need more wardrobe space. Seldom buy clothes too.

==

Should I feel flattered or bothered by the fact that I realised... Sometimes, we do not like everyone in the world. Right. Generally, I like everyone - or rather, am 'neutral' to those that I see around and are mutual acquaintances. But some guys are quite off-putting, in a certain sense. I never realised why I do not really like these 2 particular persons, until I thought about it... and it suddenly dawned on me.

Mr X is someone that happens to be in my wider posse - meaning we do have mutual groups that meet together for dinner. I like his friends very much and so talking to them, don't really bother about him, though most say he is kind of good looking. Was out celebrating a birthday when he kept on going on and on about himself, how he was heavily involved in this and that event, and how tiring it was, how much brain power was needed, and gave a sort of contented, but disappointed verbal account of his life... He also badmouthed one of his members, who, coincidentally happened to be my ex-member. I guess it was this that led me to think deeper, otherwise I wouldn't have concerned myself with his issues. I really felt his character was shady then. Being a leader, yet complaining about his tasks...in a way that just draws the attention to himself, like he is doing a lot... spending a lot of time...man! I think I am more tired but I don't complain about it. Mr X basically dominated the whole conversation, not giving any thought to those who might want to talk about more cheerful things...like birthdays. Also it's mean to keep on talking about subjects others might not be interested in, and making the whole group listen to you, and then later wondering what the dinner was about? For Mr X to rant...? Sucks.

Also, I think its unwise to talk about your members impending relationship and being overly concerned, by the way, all of the group know the member, but I think it's outrightly embarassing to say about such... honestly, Mr X's whining is unsuitable for his bearing and age. I was half glad to leave the birthday early (a handsome friend wanted to 'comfort' me), even though I really liked the company of the others.

Mr Y is someone who 'tries to be funny' - tries too hard to be funny, this kind of person; and likes to show off his knowledge in front of others, so that some gullible ones will think that he is very clever. But those really clever ones do not have to talk so much. Somehow I was trying to be neutral to him, but I no longer can... I noticed him one day, ogling me - one part of my body (not the boobs la.) I was quite disgusted. I really tried to keep a distance away from him as I was scared if he tried to 'accidentally' bump into me or keep throwing glances...at that part. More disgustingly still, he is attached, although not for a long time. Even if I tell the poor gf, what is the point? I'm also not going to get myself in this mess... Well, I told a guy friend who was also present. I shall just keep my distance from this horrid fellow. I usually don't notice this kind of thing - am quite insensitive, but I guess every woman who reads it can understand how I feel... somehow, you just know it when someone is ogling you, and if the person is someone you don't like, you will have a very yucky feeling. I caught him ogling twice that day, once when I was...adjusting the...attire that covered it... another time when I was sitting down. So disgusted! I can barely think what sort of nasty imagination is going on in his mind. I think the nickname Jeann gave him is quite apt.

I don't think that all guys are like that... I'm sure there are some girls who might be worse, but frankly nowadays I only mix around with guy friends and my female members. I've lost trust in women, knowing their nature. Especially those who claims to be your friends and then in front of you, pretend to be nice. But schemingly or not, badmouth you. Either they earn too little or they are too fat to like me. Eh? Somehow guys are not like this, you can understand... ...

So just observe the people around you... Some fascinate me. Others, their behaviour is so disgusting that maybe only a mother can love them... sad creatures.