pre-holiday stress?

Oh man, I'm going to Melbourne (Yay!) in a few days' time and just when I thought that I had finished up my pile of work, some interesting opportunities came in. Of course, I gotta work on it, who can say no to more $$$? Tee hee. It's not only about the money, it does give me an immense sense of satisfaction to 'matchmake' the right jobs to the right people, and having more 'higher' levels of jobs to fulfil this time round, it's also a fun learning experience for me to talk to those 'bigger' people. But, the pile is scary and I'm really feeling quite stressed these few days.

It's interesting to see how different people manage stress. For me I recall my previous 'breakdown and chillout for a day' and I think everyone needs that timeout once in a while. Most people become depressed due to external circumstances not within their control. Mostly due with relationships, if not then work-related financial issues.

For me, I become depressed when, thinking that I can handle whichever situations, I realized after that I actually can't, and then get down that I can't. I'm not that ambituous or capable but I always feel that I don't want to 'short-change' myself by wasting time slacking when I could spend it on more profitable pursuits. I always felt that I'm intelligent but I have wasted away my time, too much, galllivanting around, being sociable, in the past. And now I need to focus.

Anyway, it's always a comforting thought to know that anyone can excel even though he/she has a limited skillset. It only takes a little bit of thick-skin to ask people for help, opportunities, and recommendations and I'm glad I have done so.

Meanwhile I need to start packing...

lookalikes combo - BACK! By popular demand

One of the most surprising things about the World Cup is that we discovered a North Korean player that seems separated at birth from TheBoyfriend. Hmm... should we say about 98% similarity?


PRESENTING LOOKALIKES! Jeng jeng jeng!
Back by popular demand, here are the quiet celebrities in our midst. Heehee.

Please don't take offense if your genetic combination resemble any animals... ... you are still beautiful in God's sight...

Our resident bachelor who always manages to turn heads in The Church, Jelly. He's a good friend, good guy!

Some gals told me that Jelly looks like... Tay Ping Hui!


When did Tay Ping Hui act in a period drama??




Buay tahan, both also like to pose for the camera...

There are other guys in The Church who look like celebrities!
Jonas Brothers?
Stephen Chow?
David Cook?

Yes! Yes! Yes!

(the one on the right)




See...

[R], on the right...

This fellow.... of late, a stunning crooner and 'hardworking' boy:



May consider being a famous actor and Producer in the future?

Woo, did David Cook walk past me?

David Cook lookalike (must use a bit of imagination)






Can't see the resemblance?
Let's take a closer look...





Exactly like David Cook style on his album cover.


He sings, well too.

Clone's brother who looks like Kim Rae Won! Hot hot hot HOTNESS!Last seen on a cooking show at 11 pm (Channel U?)

Sorry girls, he's taken and in Malaysia...

Well, people have commented that I do look like a celebrity too... in certain angles...

Presenting to you my Rui-En pose...I also have a dimple...

Or maybe after some thick makeup application, can pass for 'Little S', Barbie Hsu's sister.
TMNT was our childhood favorite... the show and the toy. Everyone in my era was well acquainted with the four 'mutant turtles' and we all respect the great 'Master Splinter'.

Guess who?

It's Kie.

If you look deeply into his eyes... somehow, you feel like it's looking at Master Splinter!
Now over to the local scene...

The famous or infamous pastor from City Harvest, Sun Ho...And guess what, at the next table, we have Architect looking like a dead ringer for Kong Hee, her husband!

We have both Pastors in our circle of friends, how cool is that!!!

On the ground scene, I spotted a guy who looks like a younger, thinner, Pastor Bryan.

Oh yes, he said jokingly that he can 'takeover' if Pastor Bryan is taken ill. Bad boy...

But I think our favorite lookalike has to be...

Master Splinter.

self-sabotage

I just don't understand the sort of people who like to ... for lack of better apt words, 'sabotage' themselves. Lately, I've been seeing a lot of such people who come from the 'insurance' or 'financial consultant' industry. I've many good pals there and know of superb people in the field. But the ones who have worked there for around 2-4 years and are top in sales, and now, tired of running, they want to come out, just irk me to no end. Some are rude. They answer rudely to all your queries and are quite haughty... for instance, a 'senior consultant' with about 3 years of experience, he really spoil my day after I gained him an interview with our client... he said... other cos can offer him a higher position... is that all they can offer? In the first place, it's still interview stage, in the second, I've already explained clearly to him about the opportunities and he was the one who wanted to submit the application. Not only wasting my time, he proceeded to tell me off when I told him he only has a 'few' years of experience. He screamed off his head that he has had 'extensive' experience.

Sorry, but 3 years' does not count as 'extensive' to any HR Manager. For this fellow, he is definitely burning his bridges with me, and thinking too highly of yourself will not get you anywhere, seriously. I really can't believe the other fellows, whom I also thought were good and also helped to gain them interviews, one of them carried along with him, a plastic bag to the interview. Ummm... I don't know any one of my friends who would do that( I hope not)... of course, he did not get the role. Another one started off by telling a story to the Head of Department and HR Manager... and tried to gain control of the interview!

It's really maddening because we are on their side, trying to help them to facilitate this process, even telling them what to wear, what questions to prepare for, etc. And then they pull this sort of stunt. There are too many from the same industry with a similar pattern that I have to say I now no longer share a positive attitude in helping these people find their dream job. This has not happened over a long period, in fact it happens over a few weeks, and they all have stellar sales record which is something that will gain them an interview for a sales position. But other than that, they lack the basic life skills to 'make it' in the corporate industry. And then they blame the managers, blame the people, blame the world when they should take a good look at themselves. Anyway, most of us do this self-sabotaging act to ourselves as well. Not at job interviews, but at other aspects of life. Sometimes there are something we want very much in life, and there are steps to fulfil it.

Like if you want a higher management job at a corporate co, you HAVE to study again, take some certs, etc. Or if you want to change to another line as well, sometimes. If not a real cert, then at least talk to the people in the industry, attend some helpful courses, do something with your time that channels your dream into a reality.

It's the same for people not wanting to be 'left on the shelf' - male or female. Though the male have better prospects, even though their good looks may wither, they still can find a mate, or use $ to import one lovely girl from our neighboring countries... for the female, as it is often quoted, after 35, all hope is gone! So I think being proactive is good. Being proactive means asking your friends for help. I have female friends in their early 30s who ask me for help and don't you think I will love to help them? Of course, it takes a humbling of self to ask me also, most likely I will 'suan' them first... but if I do think a guy is suitable and he is open, I will make effort.

Being proactive means changing yourself. Sometimes the most basic things are so glaringly obvious... Like the guy who brings a plastic bag to the interview *cringe*... it's so obvious to any one of us not to pull those stunts, but you may have a glaringly obvious unlikeable trait to the opposite sex that you may not notice. So maybe you can ask those 'true' friends for help. I'm sure their comments will help you tremendously in your personal development.

Guys always like girls to be feminine. (Except for the rare ones, mostly angmoh, that like tomboy looking girls like my friend J)

One of my guy friend had a really bad impression of one lady, our mutual friend. Due to her facebook photos... In most of those photos she has, she always have those gung-ho and 'attitude' poses, for fun, of course. But he said it was disgusting and too manly-scary. I was quite shocked at his strong comment because he is a really nice, easygoing guy and I least expect a comment like this from him!

Guess she scared away the more maidenly guys. But I think a lot of people judge you from your photos, not on purpose, but they happen to chance upon it. In fact, some of my other guy friends have commented positively on some of my female friends in their group photos with me, and even drooled at my lovely lady friends. Well... I try not to encourage it but at least they can take it that they are being attractive to the opposite gender... =P

urban slang made easy

Some new words have been making their way into my speaking dictionary lately. Heard of 'chillax'? It means a slackerish, laid back, hang out and no stress feeling. Haha!

Chillax, chillaxin', chillaxing.
Here's how to use 'chillax' (chill + relax) in a sentence.

'what ya doin? '
'Just chillaxing at East Coast, dude.'

'why did you write/say/do/that...'
'chillax la bro... I was only joking'
'finished all my work today, now time to chillax'

'Cougar'

More commonly known as a much older woman who prefers the company of younger men,
It can also mean a really hot older woman (Also known as 'MILF')
There are also 'pumas' , who are younger cougars (30 plus year old women with slightly younger men)...seldom used though.

'Don't turn around but there's a cougar sitting behind you.'


FTW

Means 'For the win', is a more positive outlook than the opposite 'WTF'... In gaming terms it means something else but popularly now it means either a positive encouragement or someone has done something good, or 'best'. How to use:

'Man Utd bought Bebe for 2 billion bux. FTW!'

'Bedok bak chor mee. FTW!


PWN (pwned, pwn-ed, pwning)

Either means 'owned' in gaming terms ... (pwned) due to proximity of both letters being next to each other on the keyboard and misspelt by a programmer, it has grown in popularity to use 'pwn'.

Locally, it also means a gunshot sound, albeit a rather cutesy one. Try sayin 'pwn pwn pwn'. You get what I mean.

And if you have spotted some weird hairdos on teenage boys recently, it's called 'The Bieber'. Similar to our bygone eras of 'The Crewcut' (square top head popular with military personnel), The Armani' (a very cool dude hairstyle which needs lots of wax or gel to spike up the top and sides are kept short but with sideburns) ... Let me introduce to you, 'The Bieber'.


Justin Bieber's hairstyle, a front-swept fringe. This can also be a girls' hairstyle. Other popular hair guys include Zac Efron, Robert Pattinson, Adam Lambert but none as uber cool as The Bieber! I do see many many teenagers having this style now. Sign of the times!

Turtle

A photo for the weekend. Guess where? It's at Ion Orchard! Taken by Sherman of Rebirth Photography.

sittin' on the fence won't get you nowhere

There's an important question that all of us have to ask ourselves...

As you know, there's always a gap between the rich and the poor. If you could choose, would you want to be in the richer half or the poorer half?

Seriously, without a doubt, I think everyone in their right mind would say, richer half, of course!

I feel that many people shortchange themselves when it comes to choosing this path though. In many circles of devout believers being rich is almost obscene - or for that matter, being rich because of your success. I think that if you got it fair and square through your persistence and working for it, you should be proud of yourself for pushing yourself hard where others do not or can not.

But choosing this path takes sacrifices of course. Longer hours for some. More stress for some. Investments of time, money, effort, etc. Some of which may turn out to be futile. The road may be challenging but then again, definitely an exciting one. We will meet all sorts of characters and have the rose-tinted glasses pulled off our faces when we see the true nature of some... many people choose to take it easy though and just float through life. I am one of them. Thinking back, I can be too slackerish at times, although I always believe in working smart, not hard... I seem to always hit the minimum self-target that I set and then while the time away. In fact, I believe I am wasting quite a few hours of productive time each day.

So I hope to put the time to good use and churn out something good.

I also realised that those who score all 'A's in school may not turn out to be as successful as those with a killer EQ + hard work + smart work + connections + x factor in life. You see many models and actors are good looking but often the 'crowd favorite' or the most likeable ones may not be the most good-looking ones. Even the top sales representatives. Everyone has the perception that the ladies have to be very good looking or the guys very suave. But often it's not the case. There is some magic formula and I bet 'sitting on the fence' is not part of the equation.

Being in the 3rd month in this job, apart from this month, I have managed to hit all my personal targets. Yes, I did put in effort to do so. Any newbie in the industry would have been proud of my achievements. But compared to the go-getter and gung-ho attitude I used to have in my previous sales job, I think I lack that which I used to have, and I need that to go the extra mile. It really takes a go-getter attitude to talk to people when you're not in the mood or when they are not nice to talk to.

Compared to my new colleagues, I am still ahead. Some of them did not manage to close any sales in the first month... it's really God's grace that I did it so easily and thought it was so easy! I know better now...

Time to move my butt off the fence...

Picking up where it leaves off

A ghost from the past contacted me this week.

I guess I have been waiting for this to happen sooner or later. I mean, I felt like it would happen someday, there was a silent wish in my heart for us to be on good terms again.

After all, he was my best friend and we used to waste all our available PH... spending time with each other. Somehow, in the last months, I thought that I had found a 'replacement'. But the replacement could not 'make it'.

You know those kind of friends, they are the special ones. Those who actually bother to ask you how you are doing in the various aspects of your life. Those who you REALLY look forward to meeting and will save up little funny tidbits of your life to share with them. Those with whom you can take long midnight walk and chats and no alarm bells will sound for 'trouble'. In a nutshell, you can be transparent and share heart-to-heart.

Those kind of friendship that I always hope it will last a lifetime. But being realistic, also know deep down that it's kind of difficult.

I was happy he contacted me and remembering those cherished moments, glad that he remembered me too. It's too much to hope for a good outcome, but this little moment lets me know that I can have a bit of wishful thinking come true once in a while.

learning to deal

I happened to see entering a cinema, an old schoolmate, we were in the same CCA. She was barely recognizable but I recognized her with a shock. She was one of those 'A' class girls, the elite in school who could all make it to whichever JC they chose. Back then they never thought of choosing a poly, the only question was 'which JC', how times have changed. Now the brightest ones choose poly. They were the ones who took Higher Chinese, a foreign concept to me, and some even took something known as 'Chinese Literature' !!! While we not so intelligent beings played basketball after school, watched movies with our 'steads', and sat at taka square exchanging information with similar beings.

Anyways, the most shocking thing was how she looked.

I remember her as quite a pretty girl. She was about the same size, but, oh how horrendous. She was wearing an ill-fitting shapeless white tee, ill fitting jeans, and a severe bob haircut not unlike the ones we had in secondary school. She looked like an auntie from afar and I wouldn't care to be associated within her age range.

I tried to look for something flattering to be honest, but could find none... gosh.

It's funny, the way things pan out for some. We would assume that those elite girls would do well in life, as expected, being smarter, landing better jobs, attracting the same social strata of husbands, making smart choices about their investments and career, etc. But somehow through the years, and as we age, that does not paint a full picture. I remember we all rejoiced for one of our schoolmates who had to repeat a year of school. She became a manager at her early 20s when most of us were still figuring out how to deal with things.

Many who weren't doing so well in their secondary school do become good at some point in their career, take TheBoyfriend for instance. You don't want to know his PSLE score... if you really want to know... well... it's hilarious...

Others seem to do well all through school, but only have a mediocre career and other measures of success would show they are doing only passably well. Hmm.

I just thought that things aren't what we expect after all. We never expect to become friends with so-and-so, and thus when the friendship turns into years-long comfortable as a cup of warm tea and long car rides kind of friendship, it is somehow, always a surprise. For many of my friends, we seem to be strange bedfellows. Our friendship was always met with quizzical eyebrow raising and a wondrous look, like, 'oh really? You are friends with her?' look; because, no one had expected that such a nice thing as a beautiful friendship could come out of a chance encounter. Or maybe I just don't look like the kind who would befriend such. (Sadly, as I later realised, most girls would brand the kind of guys I find fascinating as friends 'boring like a piece of cardboard', 'weird' or 'very weird'. But they always bring me to interesting places and share fascinating facets, eat ice cream happily while chatting, and are ALWAYS generous, so I really can't agree!)

It takes a little bravery of the spirit to open oneself to share with these beings, wondering if anything could come out of it, saying something and hoping for a response that, you know, strikes all the right chords with you. But so frail are the human relationships that seem strong yet crumble at very minor things.

Like in (human) relationships and for 'those whom we dated/crushed/had insatiable feelings for', I've always marveled at those who kept in good humor with their ex-girlfriends, and all of them gals to boot. I've always asked them, 'how do you do that?' I never had such luck and perhaps a big part of the equation is my fault to be honest. On the other hand, I had always wanted to casually chat with "those whom my affection happened to fall upon in past moments", or even just sms-ing to ask them about their latest happenings. The curious side of me wants to know what's happening in their life... have they settled down, maybe what kind of girls they settled down with...

Growing older means we have to deal with these things. In corporate terms, this is called 'conflict management'. It seems the ones who do it really well are rewarded with higher positions and don't we all want that sometime in life? But first we must learn how to deal with our inner child of not wanting to grow up and be in a fairy tale where all seems to work out exactly as what you have hoped for.

Unless, of course, it's a dream come true. =)