'The problem is not that there are problems... The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem'
-Theodore Rubin.
In spoof of BBC's 100 things you never knew since this year (The egg came first, plus 99 more facts from this year's news)
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs/magazinemonitor/index.html#a007948
Well I leave you with some good advice for what I've learnt this year!!!
1. Invest in a good, lightweight, portable umbrella. Don't buy long umbrellas unless you want to leave it at someone's house or office... (Inevitably happens!)
2. The phone/camera/laptop/pda/mp3 player... you like will definitely have a new edition 2-6 months from the time you buy it. So either bide your time or just get it and not regret, lah...
3. If someone asks you what you think, tell them honestly what you think. Instead of jeopardizing the relationship, in time they will appreciate it. And if they don't, it shows that they are not worth keeping, in time. But, only if they really sincerely ask you about it!
4. Always invest in a good haircut. Makes a world of difference from looking unkempt/aunty/old to upper class and chic. Those who have been to Henry's at Fingerworks know what I mean...
5. Sms your friends/partners once in a while to let them know you care...and always make time to catch up over coffee, no matter how many silly excuses you have. Because, when you really need them, they will be there for you too.
6. Lend people money they have no means of returning, and you have no need of in the current. Think about it... This is really blessing the poor, the hungry, the full timers etc. I did this twice this year and really feel good!
7. Donate blood. Can save people's lives and you will think that it can get rid of your toxins you have stored up over the years. Free somemore.
8. Never stop learning new things. Even when you are surfing the net or doing some mundane stuff, you can always learn about, say, Tourette's Syndrome, instead of browsing blogs and getting all worked up over WSM (it's overly hot, don't you think?) and raging about the GST, the govt, and whatnot. Precisely if you can't be bothered about voicing your opinions where it matters, why let it affect yourself in such a way. Ditto for all anti-XX or anti-something, go improve your brain with some useful information found online.
9. Take up a hobby and involve loved ones or friends. For me I like to shop alone (cuz I don't enjoy shopping and really browse fast to get what I want) but I find it really nice to have an exercise buddy, walking partner, or someone to play sylvanian families with me.
10. Write more. Writing's an art we've learnt that has sadly been lost. I try to write - even penning down my schedules though I have a pda. There's nothing like journalling down thoughts or writing pass it on notes - something that has almost but disappeared. Bring back the pencils and paper! Scribbling, and doodling also counts.
So far so good...Have a good day!
Friday, December 29, 2006
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Allegra and the Fall.
A short story, copyright mine.
She closed her eyes and yawned, so sweetly, like a little kitten from a long, peaceful sleep. The digital hologram clock on her wall bleeped. "28th December, 2015. 1:34 pm." The alarm she set days earlier roused her into a wakeful tension, her body shrugged together, her languid eyes alert and darting around cautiously for one second. Then, sighing, she gathered up her wide skirt, having fallen around her carelessly, and stood up from the warm bed. Almost in a trance, she walked slowly to the doorstep and down the stairs, her beautifully expensive heels click-clacking on the thin layer of ice crystals formed beneath.
He watched Allegra from a distance, from the safety of the heated study, draped in a thick shawl meant to be tossed on the couch. He smiled at her leaving figure gently. After all they had went through, he felt lucky to have her. They were the only ones left for each other in this world. "I love you, Mark" she had whispered onto the mirror in the parlour before resting, and the sound of her musical voice had turned the heat and light attuned mirror into swirls of beautiful hearts with the message, almost like a kaleidoscopic twinkle of poetry, each time you look at it.
People's memories were short, she told herself as she boarded the Shinkansen. No one here remembered what happened anymore. Newspapers suffered terribly during the Fall. Now, the only way they could survive was to devote most of their electronic space to financial, and health reports. No real news was ever found since it was not lucrative. As predicted, the 2-million dollar healthcare industry in Sangria aggresively grew in the last 5 years to a 5 trillion dollar one. But the side effects of all the multivitamins and self-cancer checks was that people had forgotten what was important to them. After the Fall in Sangria, houses were built compactly without spaces for books. No one read anymore and fewer books were produced each year as paper became increasingly scarce and ibooks sold for a mere sum onweb. The radiation and waves from the various digital implements had severe debilitating effects on the memory aspect of the mind, but it was only 20 more years later when they realised the permanence of short-term memory had taken place.
Allegra also, had forgotten most of it, only that the mention of "The Fall" made her shudder and seem to be in shock for sometime. Saving precious, expensive paper, she had years ago written an account, and each year this day, in memory, she would go to the Grounds and read it. The Grounds was a beautifully, digitally enhanced landscape with birds and fruit trees, all tropical, but transported through the digital medium to exist here in Sangria.
Allegra sat under a cherry tree with rainbow colored cherries and opened an airtight capsule. The air in Sangria had discolored all natural elements, even clothes now had to be woven with only nylon threads. Most of their clothes were nylon now, the manmade fabric withstanding the harsh elements of weather and radiation. She perched herself comfortably and read.
"Dec 28, 2009.
It was one year ago that these events happened, something so terrible that even today I shudder to think about it. The violent weather which for some years now have been warning us about things to come: Earthquakes and Tsunamis, sudden electrical charges, flash floods. In Sorepa, we were ravaged by floods all around. Being a peninsula, we had no chance of survival. My meagre items were all washed away, the legacy that my parents had built up for myself and my older brother Myerl vanished in hours. The grief of losing such was replaced with joy at finding them all alive. However on the way to the refugee camp at Sangria, my brother mysteriously disappeared along with other guys his age.
Horror stories abounded for years that they were abducted mysteriously to become spies for neighboring countries, and strange evidence surfaced now and then, but I could never be sure whether Myerl is alive, and even if he was, maybe tortured, or transformed so much that perhaps death was a better option. I lost my parents within six months of each other, they both caught Rinal disease, after the floods, their respiratory systems collapsed. Now, Rinal can be controlled with just a cocktail of pills, but back then, the whole population of Sorepa died because of this strange disease. I survived because some strange antibodies in my body acclimatised myself almost instantly, and because of Mark.'
Allegra smiled as she read this. It was a blessing, even now when Mark was like this, to have him. She never doubted his evident love for her, only sighed when he did not have the strength of mind to speak it. Deep inside, she believed that in this turbulent future, some Divine Being would help them all. She uttered a soundless prayer, for any audible words she said could put them in danger of the Sangria elders, who planted hearing trees all over the countryside.
'After being in a refugee camp for 3 years, I realised that I was not so luckless after all. I saw young children who never knew they were born of noble birth and crept about on their forelegs, looking pitiful and detestable. I did not bother about the older ones, with purple welts and boils up their legs, a sure sign that later Rinal disease was to ravage them. Each day the wheezing sounds could be heard as one by one, the older ones succumbed. They went almost peacefully as though they had held their breath themselves, so peacefully that I could not grieve them.
Mark was a Sangrian not older than I, who had offered to help out in the refugee camp. A true martyr he was! But actually he was learning medicals, and this knowledge later proved to be useful to me. I saw his face as one with no beauty of form, a luckless creature, built stolidly, huge arms and hands with a weak chin and droopy eyes, not like the noble, graceful form we were used to seeing. Yet, there was something about him that enchanted me. The way his eyes watched me, with care. The way he would offer me help. I loved him for this. I wondered if I had the luck to lead a peaceful life with a noble Sorepa once. But now that my kind was dying out, this Sangrian seemed to offer me joy, and happiness should I choose to follow him. I don't know. It has been a year now and the situation has much improved. The governance of the Seven Worlds has seen to the stability of their instruments. No one lives near the Waters anymore for fear of the Fall. Two of the Worlds are now formless, lifeless, a mere black pool of water with only strange, waterliking creatures that inhabit its surface. Noble Sorepares have migrated either into Sangria or the fierce Wilds of Shylom. And me, I have decided to make my home with Mark as long as I live.'
There were more writings beyond this sentence, but time had rendered them almost invisible. However after her memory was regained every year by this letter, Allegra relived those bitter times once again. And she rejoiced with a smile that she had things to smile about.
Their lives had been prolonged with artifical intelligence, since all sustenance had been destroyed in Sangria and most of the Seven Worlds. Mark was noiselessly pacing about the house, with a furrowed brow and only when Allegra returned, he broke into a smile. "Allegra! Allegra, my love!" She smoothed his face till it was shining brightly with unshed tears, and she, on the verge of tears itself, just invoked his name, such a dear syllable to her own heart, again and again. He would never have the intelligence to live independently on his own nor the mind to fathom medical disorders as he once did. The artifical intelligence destroyed him and he only remembered her - Allegra, and that he loved her. And that was all.
She closed her eyes and yawned, so sweetly, like a little kitten from a long, peaceful sleep. The digital hologram clock on her wall bleeped. "28th December, 2015. 1:34 pm." The alarm she set days earlier roused her into a wakeful tension, her body shrugged together, her languid eyes alert and darting around cautiously for one second. Then, sighing, she gathered up her wide skirt, having fallen around her carelessly, and stood up from the warm bed. Almost in a trance, she walked slowly to the doorstep and down the stairs, her beautifully expensive heels click-clacking on the thin layer of ice crystals formed beneath.
He watched Allegra from a distance, from the safety of the heated study, draped in a thick shawl meant to be tossed on the couch. He smiled at her leaving figure gently. After all they had went through, he felt lucky to have her. They were the only ones left for each other in this world. "I love you, Mark" she had whispered onto the mirror in the parlour before resting, and the sound of her musical voice had turned the heat and light attuned mirror into swirls of beautiful hearts with the message, almost like a kaleidoscopic twinkle of poetry, each time you look at it.
People's memories were short, she told herself as she boarded the Shinkansen. No one here remembered what happened anymore. Newspapers suffered terribly during the Fall. Now, the only way they could survive was to devote most of their electronic space to financial, and health reports. No real news was ever found since it was not lucrative. As predicted, the 2-million dollar healthcare industry in Sangria aggresively grew in the last 5 years to a 5 trillion dollar one. But the side effects of all the multivitamins and self-cancer checks was that people had forgotten what was important to them. After the Fall in Sangria, houses were built compactly without spaces for books. No one read anymore and fewer books were produced each year as paper became increasingly scarce and ibooks sold for a mere sum onweb. The radiation and waves from the various digital implements had severe debilitating effects on the memory aspect of the mind, but it was only 20 more years later when they realised the permanence of short-term memory had taken place.
Allegra also, had forgotten most of it, only that the mention of "The Fall" made her shudder and seem to be in shock for sometime. Saving precious, expensive paper, she had years ago written an account, and each year this day, in memory, she would go to the Grounds and read it. The Grounds was a beautifully, digitally enhanced landscape with birds and fruit trees, all tropical, but transported through the digital medium to exist here in Sangria.
Allegra sat under a cherry tree with rainbow colored cherries and opened an airtight capsule. The air in Sangria had discolored all natural elements, even clothes now had to be woven with only nylon threads. Most of their clothes were nylon now, the manmade fabric withstanding the harsh elements of weather and radiation. She perched herself comfortably and read.
"Dec 28, 2009.
It was one year ago that these events happened, something so terrible that even today I shudder to think about it. The violent weather which for some years now have been warning us about things to come: Earthquakes and Tsunamis, sudden electrical charges, flash floods. In Sorepa, we were ravaged by floods all around. Being a peninsula, we had no chance of survival. My meagre items were all washed away, the legacy that my parents had built up for myself and my older brother Myerl vanished in hours. The grief of losing such was replaced with joy at finding them all alive. However on the way to the refugee camp at Sangria, my brother mysteriously disappeared along with other guys his age.
Horror stories abounded for years that they were abducted mysteriously to become spies for neighboring countries, and strange evidence surfaced now and then, but I could never be sure whether Myerl is alive, and even if he was, maybe tortured, or transformed so much that perhaps death was a better option. I lost my parents within six months of each other, they both caught Rinal disease, after the floods, their respiratory systems collapsed. Now, Rinal can be controlled with just a cocktail of pills, but back then, the whole population of Sorepa died because of this strange disease. I survived because some strange antibodies in my body acclimatised myself almost instantly, and because of Mark.'
Allegra smiled as she read this. It was a blessing, even now when Mark was like this, to have him. She never doubted his evident love for her, only sighed when he did not have the strength of mind to speak it. Deep inside, she believed that in this turbulent future, some Divine Being would help them all. She uttered a soundless prayer, for any audible words she said could put them in danger of the Sangria elders, who planted hearing trees all over the countryside.
'After being in a refugee camp for 3 years, I realised that I was not so luckless after all. I saw young children who never knew they were born of noble birth and crept about on their forelegs, looking pitiful and detestable. I did not bother about the older ones, with purple welts and boils up their legs, a sure sign that later Rinal disease was to ravage them. Each day the wheezing sounds could be heard as one by one, the older ones succumbed. They went almost peacefully as though they had held their breath themselves, so peacefully that I could not grieve them.
Mark was a Sangrian not older than I, who had offered to help out in the refugee camp. A true martyr he was! But actually he was learning medicals, and this knowledge later proved to be useful to me. I saw his face as one with no beauty of form, a luckless creature, built stolidly, huge arms and hands with a weak chin and droopy eyes, not like the noble, graceful form we were used to seeing. Yet, there was something about him that enchanted me. The way his eyes watched me, with care. The way he would offer me help. I loved him for this. I wondered if I had the luck to lead a peaceful life with a noble Sorepa once. But now that my kind was dying out, this Sangrian seemed to offer me joy, and happiness should I choose to follow him. I don't know. It has been a year now and the situation has much improved. The governance of the Seven Worlds has seen to the stability of their instruments. No one lives near the Waters anymore for fear of the Fall. Two of the Worlds are now formless, lifeless, a mere black pool of water with only strange, waterliking creatures that inhabit its surface. Noble Sorepares have migrated either into Sangria or the fierce Wilds of Shylom. And me, I have decided to make my home with Mark as long as I live.'
There were more writings beyond this sentence, but time had rendered them almost invisible. However after her memory was regained every year by this letter, Allegra relived those bitter times once again. And she rejoiced with a smile that she had things to smile about.
Their lives had been prolonged with artifical intelligence, since all sustenance had been destroyed in Sangria and most of the Seven Worlds. Mark was noiselessly pacing about the house, with a furrowed brow and only when Allegra returned, he broke into a smile. "Allegra! Allegra, my love!" She smoothed his face till it was shining brightly with unshed tears, and she, on the verge of tears itself, just invoked his name, such a dear syllable to her own heart, again and again. He would never have the intelligence to live independently on his own nor the mind to fathom medical disorders as he once did. The artifical intelligence destroyed him and he only remembered her - Allegra, and that he loved her. And that was all.
Tuesday, December 26, 2006
The people we meet on earth
Boxing Day... Time to open presents!
Go read the 5 people you meet in heaven by mitch alborn. It's really
excellent. Excellent plot, storyline and idea. Just wished it could be longer...
I haven't opened all of my presents yet...
It's always a special time of the year for me, enjoyed myself with the members yesterday playing sily games and just chilling out at Marina Pier after service. It's nice that we can gather together like this... I've never been one for big gatherings but of course, I would choose to gather with a nice bunch of folks than with just my boyfriend alone at home. It's through remembering people at this time of the year that we build ourselves. Sometimes, we may be harboring sad thoughts, maybe things in relationships or career might not be going well, but it's always a time to stop and take stock of the blessings you've received from friends this year.
For those who have been treated badly by loved ones, really feel the tinge of pain this season. Somehow I had a feeling of pain - still there, though it's been some time now. I guess it's the pain of not confiding to anyone my past woes - or rather, scared to confide, in a way fearing no one could understand the torment I was in. And sitting next to friends who have their own deep hurts, I wanted so badly to perhaps, share a little of my story. It's a long story, but all I can say is that once, some time ago, almost forgotten but hearing his name still draws up sharp pangs of what could be termed as a painful love. This emotion changed me, I am almost wary and guarded upon strangers I would have once embraced as my own.
I guess I have written about it, previously and more than I could bear.
Having stopped correspondence with him intentionally, I sometimes wonder how he is...yet, not really wanting to know. We shared deep moments, a familiar recognition of the soul-deep feelings both knew, that was there, a care for one another that could barely be expressed as friendship. Yet, knowing him brought out such character in me, which I never realised was in myself, that I cannot say knowing him has been a bane in my life.
That is why I have so many mixed emotions towards that time in my life that I find it more joyful to altogether forget about it completely.
Many have said that they find my writings here, inspiring...although I react to that comment with pleasant surprise. For I never meant intentionally to inspire anyone with the doings and feelings about my life, only that it was meant to be a recollection of thoughts, as true as I possibly can remember it. But I do hope that instead of feeling sadder than they once were, people can read, and take with them a strange comradeship that I too, feel this way once.
Though I do not have the guts to spill out my feelings to anyone, this platform is a place where I can voice out my thoughts into writing. I may seem insulting, even mocking at times about people's love affairs, I do care. I guess I really don'r bother to say it out, since I know that at this time, my words will probably be disregarded, as I have experienced time and again. But it does not give me any joy to see what I have predicted come to pass. I guess I am blessed - or cursed - with a sort of 'second sight', predicting the outcome of certain relationships, how they will work out, and what will happen. Often I am right in this ability to predict things happening based on human nature, and sadly so. Perhaps it's this ability that makes me shy away from certain people, knowing that inevitably this kind of relationships bring nothing but pain. I too, wonder sometimes why people love each other the way they do. I suspect it's because the other, is somewhat a reflection of themselves.
That in loving them, we bring out the best, and sometimes the worst in ourselves.
Go read the 5 people you meet in heaven by mitch alborn. It's really
excellent. Excellent plot, storyline and idea. Just wished it could be longer...
I haven't opened all of my presents yet...
It's always a special time of the year for me, enjoyed myself with the members yesterday playing sily games and just chilling out at Marina Pier after service. It's nice that we can gather together like this... I've never been one for big gatherings but of course, I would choose to gather with a nice bunch of folks than with just my boyfriend alone at home. It's through remembering people at this time of the year that we build ourselves. Sometimes, we may be harboring sad thoughts, maybe things in relationships or career might not be going well, but it's always a time to stop and take stock of the blessings you've received from friends this year.
For those who have been treated badly by loved ones, really feel the tinge of pain this season. Somehow I had a feeling of pain - still there, though it's been some time now. I guess it's the pain of not confiding to anyone my past woes - or rather, scared to confide, in a way fearing no one could understand the torment I was in. And sitting next to friends who have their own deep hurts, I wanted so badly to perhaps, share a little of my story. It's a long story, but all I can say is that once, some time ago, almost forgotten but hearing his name still draws up sharp pangs of what could be termed as a painful love. This emotion changed me, I am almost wary and guarded upon strangers I would have once embraced as my own.
I guess I have written about it, previously and more than I could bear.
Having stopped correspondence with him intentionally, I sometimes wonder how he is...yet, not really wanting to know. We shared deep moments, a familiar recognition of the soul-deep feelings both knew, that was there, a care for one another that could barely be expressed as friendship. Yet, knowing him brought out such character in me, which I never realised was in myself, that I cannot say knowing him has been a bane in my life.
That is why I have so many mixed emotions towards that time in my life that I find it more joyful to altogether forget about it completely.
Many have said that they find my writings here, inspiring...although I react to that comment with pleasant surprise. For I never meant intentionally to inspire anyone with the doings and feelings about my life, only that it was meant to be a recollection of thoughts, as true as I possibly can remember it. But I do hope that instead of feeling sadder than they once were, people can read, and take with them a strange comradeship that I too, feel this way once.
Though I do not have the guts to spill out my feelings to anyone, this platform is a place where I can voice out my thoughts into writing. I may seem insulting, even mocking at times about people's love affairs, I do care. I guess I really don'r bother to say it out, since I know that at this time, my words will probably be disregarded, as I have experienced time and again. But it does not give me any joy to see what I have predicted come to pass. I guess I am blessed - or cursed - with a sort of 'second sight', predicting the outcome of certain relationships, how they will work out, and what will happen. Often I am right in this ability to predict things happening based on human nature, and sadly so. Perhaps it's this ability that makes me shy away from certain people, knowing that inevitably this kind of relationships bring nothing but pain. I too, wonder sometimes why people love each other the way they do. I suspect it's because the other, is somewhat a reflection of themselves.
That in loving them, we bring out the best, and sometimes the worst in ourselves.
Monday, December 18, 2006
I bought a house!
Feeling really pleased with myself.
Started giving and receiving gifts already, so excited! I usually open my gifts on the morning of 25th December (usually go to Mass on the 24th) and this year is no exception, though the thought of opening them earlier is very very tempting.
For our rather wet-dry run for the party we pleasantly found a garage sale hosted by some japanese families. On retrospect I thought I should have bought more, but unsuspectingly I found myself an owner of a rather big sylvanian family house - only sold in Japan as I have not seen it in local shops. It was only $10 so I took it as these houses retail for about ten times that price. Oh and the japanese version is so much nicer than the made in UK ones.
Well, thinking I had only bought the house with furniture of 2 stoves and table and chairs, I was pleasantly surprised to find additions of a Mother Bear, two adult Bunnies, small baby bunnies and a couple of kittens! Plus two school desks. With miniature pencilboxes and mini pencils inside. Even the notebook has real paper. House looks something like the picture but different style. So I'm really happy that my small christmas present to myself has turned out to be something so valuable to me. Have displayed the critters on a shelf where I can look at it everyday before I go to sleep.
And I want a Cottontail Bunny (beige) for sure. They're always sold out (the size that I want) so... it would be really nice if I had one.
=)
Wednesday, December 13, 2006
The Fraud Case, continued.
The irascible agent called me. 4 times on Monday, but I was overseas and gleefully advised him to call me the next day.
Well yesterday he did, and horrors! He asked me to 'do him a favor', change my statement to "I accidentally forgot I signed the form" (which is so obviously not signed) and talked to me for about half an hour in an upbeat voice, trying to make it seem like it was all in a day's work.
He told me that he had to hit this Persistency Award thing - more bonus $ perhaps, and said that actually I was being insured for free while he paid and could I bear with it till Jan or Feb?
I said, no, I don't want this thing, even if its being insured for free. He was pretty convincing (Can win the Golden Horse award for best performance) and almost too sincere that I was slightly taken aback. He cajoled me to help him, using emotional hot buttons like, he has a family to feed, he needs this income.
Actually he did not know that it was the Head office that called me for the investigation, thinking that I had written in to complain. He was taken aback when I sternly said that it was a Senior Exec who called me in. I added fuel to the fire by saying "They have been investigating you long ago." And I asked casually how many others did he do the same thing, forge the signature, thus cheating the company by getting more bonus out of it. He replied tersely, "Haha. That's for me to know." (Surely, this kind of statement means that its many people...)
The point that made my blood boil was when he said, "Remember I told you before, you can depend on me? Now I need your help. Remember, I once helped you too when you were in financial difficulties." Wow! Like when? The only time I had 'financial difficulties' was when I didn't/couldn't pay for the policy and let it lapse... which I wanted to anyway. I did pay him the lapsed amount after a few months for nothing. So it should be that he owes me, not the other way around. The way he tried to use these emotional words on me was too much, but trying not to antagonize him (He knows where I live and work and all sort of other details), in the end I said, I'd think about it... (Helping him to lie and keep his income.)
I have no intention to do so, and I think if the company found out that he has been asking me to falsify my statement, he would be in deeper trouble. I shook my head at his stupidity!
So, I have until the end of the week to think of something to say to him that sounds, un-antagonizing because I don't want him to go crazy and blame me for his woes and creep up my doorstep one day! Actually I have no complains in this matter because I'm being insured for free (although without my knowledge and against my free will) but he is cheating the company, not me. I doubt that even if I help him, the charges will be waived. And if I help him, isn't it like being an accomplice for embezzlement, without any returns?
Well yesterday he did, and horrors! He asked me to 'do him a favor', change my statement to "I accidentally forgot I signed the form" (which is so obviously not signed) and talked to me for about half an hour in an upbeat voice, trying to make it seem like it was all in a day's work.
He told me that he had to hit this Persistency Award thing - more bonus $ perhaps, and said that actually I was being insured for free while he paid and could I bear with it till Jan or Feb?
I said, no, I don't want this thing, even if its being insured for free. He was pretty convincing (Can win the Golden Horse award for best performance) and almost too sincere that I was slightly taken aback. He cajoled me to help him, using emotional hot buttons like, he has a family to feed, he needs this income.
Actually he did not know that it was the Head office that called me for the investigation, thinking that I had written in to complain. He was taken aback when I sternly said that it was a Senior Exec who called me in. I added fuel to the fire by saying "They have been investigating you long ago." And I asked casually how many others did he do the same thing, forge the signature, thus cheating the company by getting more bonus out of it. He replied tersely, "Haha. That's for me to know." (Surely, this kind of statement means that its many people...)
The point that made my blood boil was when he said, "Remember I told you before, you can depend on me? Now I need your help. Remember, I once helped you too when you were in financial difficulties." Wow! Like when? The only time I had 'financial difficulties' was when I didn't/couldn't pay for the policy and let it lapse... which I wanted to anyway. I did pay him the lapsed amount after a few months for nothing. So it should be that he owes me, not the other way around. The way he tried to use these emotional words on me was too much, but trying not to antagonize him (He knows where I live and work and all sort of other details), in the end I said, I'd think about it... (Helping him to lie and keep his income.)
I have no intention to do so, and I think if the company found out that he has been asking me to falsify my statement, he would be in deeper trouble. I shook my head at his stupidity!
So, I have until the end of the week to think of something to say to him that sounds, un-antagonizing because I don't want him to go crazy and blame me for his woes and creep up my doorstep one day! Actually I have no complains in this matter because I'm being insured for free (although without my knowledge and against my free will) but he is cheating the company, not me. I doubt that even if I help him, the charges will be waived. And if I help him, isn't it like being an accomplice for embezzlement, without any returns?
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Do it for God if you believe in Him.
If your heart is for God, everywhere you go, you will find Him. Everything you do and say is for Him. If you focusing on God and you believe in Him, wonderful things will happen.
Christmas party plans are underway and all of us are so excited after the trial run yesterday at the Newton condo. We found nice spots to 'travel' in and bring our friends too. Just really tying up some loose ends now. We make a great team! It's heartwarming to see almost everyone chipping in and doing their bit and more...Giving stuff, making and ordering food, inviting friends, etc. What's the spirit of Christmas if these are not done? =)
After the Angel sharing at cell, realised many interesting happenings in our Core. Members were blessed by strangers - one member got a Cold Storage discount (unheard of!) just because she paid in cash, and many other strange stranger blessings to.
Well... I got the chance to be an Angel.
Went one day to have lunch with Col and somehow he, last-minutely, could not meet me. Since I loved the Thai food there and already set off, I just decided to eat on my own. As I was approaching the overhead bridge, an uncle standing at the foot spoke to me in Chinese, something like, if it's safe to cross. I wanted to just pretend I didn't really understand and walked away, but somehow I just stuck my head out. Zoom! came the cars, and although there were people jay-running, I told him, better not cross here. Too dangerous. He hesitated for a long time and told me he had to get to the other side to take a bus to Thomson Medical Centre. It was only then I looked back at him and realised he only had one leg. The other, was a fake one, so barbie doll beige that it looked scarier than if he had none.
Then in my halting Chinese, I told him to take a cab and pulled out $xx bucks from my purse. He, in the Chinese way, flatly refused my money, saying that I was an office staff, I needed to eat, blah blah. Then I told him I didn't need this money, but the way I put it in Chinese (Wo bu xu yao qian), sounded as if I was filthy rich, haha. Then his eyes brightened and took it. To cut the long story short, he told me how he got into this situation and he lives alone, and asked me which Deity do I honor. I shook my head and said, no, I go to church.
He then brightened up again and said that he used to go to this church in Redhill but not anymore as it was too far. Wrote him the Chinese service in my church, plus my name and to look for a certain Uncle there... he mentioned that he would come by after Christmas. Wee! I hope he does, sincerely!
Another little testimony, God immediately answered a few of my small prayers, showing that He cares. Sick and coughing my head off and couldn't sleep one sleepless night. Hoped for a better day, plus I'm quite traumatised about coughing like that as I had childhood asthma. I prayed that the cough would stop and laid hands, cursed the sickness, etc.
And I was shocked. The cough - the long, hacking, painful cough that had plagued me the whole night... simply disappeared just like that. My throat was still feeling really painful and itchy like I wanted to cough, but each time I opened my mouth nothing came out. Still can't believe it.
I slept a peaceful sleep that night, but not before I thanked God in a silent prayer.
Christmas party plans are underway and all of us are so excited after the trial run yesterday at the Newton condo. We found nice spots to 'travel' in and bring our friends too. Just really tying up some loose ends now. We make a great team! It's heartwarming to see almost everyone chipping in and doing their bit and more...Giving stuff, making and ordering food, inviting friends, etc. What's the spirit of Christmas if these are not done? =)
After the Angel sharing at cell, realised many interesting happenings in our Core. Members were blessed by strangers - one member got a Cold Storage discount (unheard of!) just because she paid in cash, and many other strange stranger blessings to.
Well... I got the chance to be an Angel.
Went one day to have lunch with Col and somehow he, last-minutely, could not meet me. Since I loved the Thai food there and already set off, I just decided to eat on my own. As I was approaching the overhead bridge, an uncle standing at the foot spoke to me in Chinese, something like, if it's safe to cross. I wanted to just pretend I didn't really understand and walked away, but somehow I just stuck my head out. Zoom! came the cars, and although there were people jay-running, I told him, better not cross here. Too dangerous. He hesitated for a long time and told me he had to get to the other side to take a bus to Thomson Medical Centre. It was only then I looked back at him and realised he only had one leg. The other, was a fake one, so barbie doll beige that it looked scarier than if he had none.
Then in my halting Chinese, I told him to take a cab and pulled out $xx bucks from my purse. He, in the Chinese way, flatly refused my money, saying that I was an office staff, I needed to eat, blah blah. Then I told him I didn't need this money, but the way I put it in Chinese (Wo bu xu yao qian), sounded as if I was filthy rich, haha. Then his eyes brightened and took it. To cut the long story short, he told me how he got into this situation and he lives alone, and asked me which Deity do I honor. I shook my head and said, no, I go to church.
He then brightened up again and said that he used to go to this church in Redhill but not anymore as it was too far. Wrote him the Chinese service in my church, plus my name and to look for a certain Uncle there... he mentioned that he would come by after Christmas. Wee! I hope he does, sincerely!
Another little testimony, God immediately answered a few of my small prayers, showing that He cares. Sick and coughing my head off and couldn't sleep one sleepless night. Hoped for a better day, plus I'm quite traumatised about coughing like that as I had childhood asthma. I prayed that the cough would stop and laid hands, cursed the sickness, etc.
And I was shocked. The cough - the long, hacking, painful cough that had plagued me the whole night... simply disappeared just like that. My throat was still feeling really painful and itchy like I wanted to cough, but each time I opened my mouth nothing came out. Still can't believe it.
I slept a peaceful sleep that night, but not before I thanked God in a silent prayer.
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Mismatched
When you really love someone...
Reading "The two sides of love" (Smalley/Trent) bought from the campus crusade sale. Was looking for a book about relationships to fire up for the new year!
Went there with Jean and Kie...Initially picked up a book "Before you live together" thinking it was about, preparing for marriage...but it turned out to be for people who were considering cohabiting. Heh.
I've been attached for most of my teenage life, so somehow I think can safely spot 'unhealthy' our 'out-of-balance' relationships... I've been in them myself. Actually, I'm someone who is fiecely independent, though I do need a man's hand to guide me through and give me some comfort when I've taken ill, like in the last two days. It's cheery to know someone is hoping you'll recover soon (so that you can go JB with him) ...makes you feel better faster.
But it's when the relationship you're in becomes off-kilter to almost everyone, then it's time to take a good look at yourself, and each other. Some relationships turn this way, very fast. I remember one of my christian leaders telling me (about this ex-boyfriend when we were still together). He cautioned that, the ex-boyfriend puts me on a pedestal. True enough, I did feel like I was some sort of goddess. But what excellent treatment he gave! Paid for the two of us through everything, bought me little gifts, never hesitated to treat me super-good. Of course, also his upbringing had to play a part as Indonesians were known for their chivalry...and also their possessiveness.
It got a little strangulating when we had to talk for at least an hour every night (And I was a busy busy student) and had to perpetually sms him my wherabouts hourly. Not forgetting the nightmare when he got angry when I wanted to catch up with MrBestFriend, wanting to throw our ring into the Sentosa river, and when I was out with MsBestFriend he called me more than 60 times (I just refused to pick up.) As time passed it gradually became an unhealthy relationship even though we were suited for each other. I don't blame him now, perhaps it was his first, and perhaps he loved me so much it became this way.
Residue of the past still remain, though. I only remember the good parts so when my poor tired darling does not live up to treating me like a goddess, there are whispers in my head saying, X used to treat me better. He always ..... .... not like this one. Plus ongoing concerns from other parties make me a bit confident of my self-worth.
Of course I am trying to erase this.
Was really shocked when my posse and I realized that a loser guy in our acquaintance was now attached, after harboring some emotions for a girl in our posse. We secretly wondered what did the girl see in him! Well, he is someone who is very complicated, to say the least. All of us cannot believe the stories he told different ones of us about his seemingly mentally unstable parents and his long foray into distant lands. I believed he was somewhat of a crackpot when he told the girl in my posse that he had to go to the beach to meditate and let God speak to him about their relationship! Of course, probably he listened to his flesh more than anything else. Recently, he penned love sonnets for his new catch. I just wonder if we had the chance to tell her what transpired, would she still think the world of him? Or blinded by true love, choose to be at her side till death doth them part. All I can say to him is Thee mind is warped.
There is a lack of gatekeepers in this area, and all too often we blame our folly on others. If we were hurt, we blame the leader from not warning us. We blame pastors for not preaching about such, or friends for not telling us from the start what a menacing creature he was. Sometimes, no one can talk you into (or out of) anything. Sometimes the warnings and cautions were there but we fail to take it seriously. I would not be glad to say 'I told you so', rather, before the thing even has a chance to start, why let it happen? I think I'd be glad to honestly say stuff if the other party is teachable, I will voice my opinion. Some in my posse are already telling me stuff I cannot even believe took place. Sharing a spoon? Constantly playing and rubbing? Sitting on each other at bus stops?
Thankfully I was not there to witness the spectacle. My members are concerned, too. That a sincere member might be lost. So many have said, she has changed. Even worse, stumbling a younger member by what they are doing. Or even causing duress to the public by their actions. If this is true love, then I don't think you should invite everyone to witness your intimacy.
They ask me why I refuse to even give a word of caution. I replied that, hey, if the person is not teachable, what is the point of saying it... (everyone else is talking about it anyways)
But if she remembers clearly, before they were attached, I had told her exactly what I had thought.
So my friend, please consider carefully your ways. You are not doing it for me, it's for everyone else and dare I mention God, too.
Reading "The two sides of love" (Smalley/Trent) bought from the campus crusade sale. Was looking for a book about relationships to fire up for the new year!
Went there with Jean and Kie...Initially picked up a book "Before you live together" thinking it was about, preparing for marriage...but it turned out to be for people who were considering cohabiting. Heh.
I've been attached for most of my teenage life, so somehow I think can safely spot 'unhealthy' our 'out-of-balance' relationships... I've been in them myself. Actually, I'm someone who is fiecely independent, though I do need a man's hand to guide me through and give me some comfort when I've taken ill, like in the last two days. It's cheery to know someone is hoping you'll recover soon (so that you can go JB with him) ...makes you feel better faster.
But it's when the relationship you're in becomes off-kilter to almost everyone, then it's time to take a good look at yourself, and each other. Some relationships turn this way, very fast. I remember one of my christian leaders telling me (about this ex-boyfriend when we were still together). He cautioned that, the ex-boyfriend puts me on a pedestal. True enough, I did feel like I was some sort of goddess. But what excellent treatment he gave! Paid for the two of us through everything, bought me little gifts, never hesitated to treat me super-good. Of course, also his upbringing had to play a part as Indonesians were known for their chivalry...and also their possessiveness.
It got a little strangulating when we had to talk for at least an hour every night (And I was a busy busy student) and had to perpetually sms him my wherabouts hourly. Not forgetting the nightmare when he got angry when I wanted to catch up with MrBestFriend, wanting to throw our ring into the Sentosa river, and when I was out with MsBestFriend he called me more than 60 times (I just refused to pick up.) As time passed it gradually became an unhealthy relationship even though we were suited for each other. I don't blame him now, perhaps it was his first, and perhaps he loved me so much it became this way.
Residue of the past still remain, though. I only remember the good parts so when my poor tired darling does not live up to treating me like a goddess, there are whispers in my head saying, X used to treat me better. He always ..... .... not like this one. Plus ongoing concerns from other parties make me a bit confident of my self-worth.
Of course I am trying to erase this.
Was really shocked when my posse and I realized that a loser guy in our acquaintance was now attached, after harboring some emotions for a girl in our posse. We secretly wondered what did the girl see in him! Well, he is someone who is very complicated, to say the least. All of us cannot believe the stories he told different ones of us about his seemingly mentally unstable parents and his long foray into distant lands. I believed he was somewhat of a crackpot when he told the girl in my posse that he had to go to the beach to meditate and let God speak to him about their relationship! Of course, probably he listened to his flesh more than anything else. Recently, he penned love sonnets for his new catch. I just wonder if we had the chance to tell her what transpired, would she still think the world of him? Or blinded by true love, choose to be at her side till death doth them part. All I can say to him is Thee mind is warped.
There is a lack of gatekeepers in this area, and all too often we blame our folly on others. If we were hurt, we blame the leader from not warning us. We blame pastors for not preaching about such, or friends for not telling us from the start what a menacing creature he was. Sometimes, no one can talk you into (or out of) anything. Sometimes the warnings and cautions were there but we fail to take it seriously. I would not be glad to say 'I told you so', rather, before the thing even has a chance to start, why let it happen? I think I'd be glad to honestly say stuff if the other party is teachable, I will voice my opinion. Some in my posse are already telling me stuff I cannot even believe took place. Sharing a spoon? Constantly playing and rubbing? Sitting on each other at bus stops?
Thankfully I was not there to witness the spectacle. My members are concerned, too. That a sincere member might be lost. So many have said, she has changed. Even worse, stumbling a younger member by what they are doing. Or even causing duress to the public by their actions. If this is true love, then I don't think you should invite everyone to witness your intimacy.
They ask me why I refuse to even give a word of caution. I replied that, hey, if the person is not teachable, what is the point of saying it... (everyone else is talking about it anyways)
But if she remembers clearly, before they were attached, I had told her exactly what I had thought.
So my friend, please consider carefully your ways. You are not doing it for me, it's for everyone else and dare I mention God, too.
Friday, December 01, 2006
The Fraud Case.
I forgot to let the Holy Spirit do His work.
Read "The Cross and the SwitchBlade", reminded me of what I'm going to set out to do but somehow forgot along the way. Isn't it amazing how God can remind me of my purpose by simple things. Lately, the Holy Spirit has been ministering to me in so many ways I am softened by His love, actually.
Someone forged my signature.
Quite amazing because these are stories you only hear about from hearsay or watch on drama serials, but unfortunately (for the forger/fraudster) my signature was forged.
And not for a million dollars... Haha. Although I'm sure it will shock some of my friends if they knew I had a million dollars in my account. (don't have lah, for illustration purposes.)
I had signed up for an insurance policy from Prudential in '05... a cashback plan where yo can get money back every year, yet saving for your needs. End '05, I had it terminated because I was unsure if I could keep it up (Having just started in The Office) and I was also short on cash. I was told that I could stop it for a year and then restart it again, and initially agreed to it. However, later on I realised that if I stopped for a year, I could not have this chance to stop it again, I would have to keep paying for 20 years more. Not wanting to be caught in this situation, as who knows what might happen in the future, I decided then I would terminate it and informed the agent likewise.
A year later, last month, I received a GIRO receipt from the bank stating they have deducted a sum for Prudential. Thinking that perhaps they might have made a mistake, I then called the hotline to enquire.
What ensued was that somehow, I had signed some documents despite not even seeing my agent this past year. I had to go down to Prudential Towers to check it out, and was warned that it was a possible fraud case. I was shown some documents I've never seen before, and then asked to verify my signature. It was almost laughable. Whoever forged my signature, did so with a photocopier. It obviously looked photostated, exactly the same.
Well, I think one agent would suddenly have his banking account frozen and then hauled to a police enquiry. Although I did not wish to press charges (Since I had no loss anyways) they said, even a fraud of $10 is still a fraud. This guy's career as a financial advisor would probably be over from now on. I heard that he had recently reached the 'million dollar club' in the company, quite an achievement there. But one also wonders , how did he reach it?
All in all, it seems sad and wasted that just an act of folly could destroy all you have been building up for your life. Just because of two photocopied signatures, you singlehandedly destroyed all those long hours of sales talk. It's not in my hands now, but in the company's best interests to persecute him as an employee.
I wonder whether his upbringing could have contributed to such factors, but I guess it's up to himself to decide on such a course of action.
So, if anyone of us are in this situation, I urge all to think twice. Even doing such small things as stealing office supplies, I hope it will not lead to a greater mistake. It's better to have a good night's sleep knowing all your actions are aboveboard.
Read "The Cross and the SwitchBlade", reminded me of what I'm going to set out to do but somehow forgot along the way. Isn't it amazing how God can remind me of my purpose by simple things. Lately, the Holy Spirit has been ministering to me in so many ways I am softened by His love, actually.
Someone forged my signature.
Quite amazing because these are stories you only hear about from hearsay or watch on drama serials, but unfortunately (for the forger/fraudster) my signature was forged.
And not for a million dollars... Haha. Although I'm sure it will shock some of my friends if they knew I had a million dollars in my account. (don't have lah, for illustration purposes.)
I had signed up for an insurance policy from Prudential in '05... a cashback plan where yo can get money back every year, yet saving for your needs. End '05, I had it terminated because I was unsure if I could keep it up (Having just started in The Office) and I was also short on cash. I was told that I could stop it for a year and then restart it again, and initially agreed to it. However, later on I realised that if I stopped for a year, I could not have this chance to stop it again, I would have to keep paying for 20 years more. Not wanting to be caught in this situation, as who knows what might happen in the future, I decided then I would terminate it and informed the agent likewise.
A year later, last month, I received a GIRO receipt from the bank stating they have deducted a sum for Prudential. Thinking that perhaps they might have made a mistake, I then called the hotline to enquire.
What ensued was that somehow, I had signed some documents despite not even seeing my agent this past year. I had to go down to Prudential Towers to check it out, and was warned that it was a possible fraud case. I was shown some documents I've never seen before, and then asked to verify my signature. It was almost laughable. Whoever forged my signature, did so with a photocopier. It obviously looked photostated, exactly the same.
Well, I think one agent would suddenly have his banking account frozen and then hauled to a police enquiry. Although I did not wish to press charges (Since I had no loss anyways) they said, even a fraud of $10 is still a fraud. This guy's career as a financial advisor would probably be over from now on. I heard that he had recently reached the 'million dollar club' in the company, quite an achievement there. But one also wonders , how did he reach it?
All in all, it seems sad and wasted that just an act of folly could destroy all you have been building up for your life. Just because of two photocopied signatures, you singlehandedly destroyed all those long hours of sales talk. It's not in my hands now, but in the company's best interests to persecute him as an employee.
I wonder whether his upbringing could have contributed to such factors, but I guess it's up to himself to decide on such a course of action.
So, if anyone of us are in this situation, I urge all to think twice. Even doing such small things as stealing office supplies, I hope it will not lead to a greater mistake. It's better to have a good night's sleep knowing all your actions are aboveboard.
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Starting early this year
On the topic of love,
Recently I had the pleasure of acquaintance with a lovely couple that seemed just about right for each other. J was a lovely girl, and M reminded me of Kie but none of the goofy-ness. He looked sleepy-eyed and talked slowly with witticisms sure to make you burst belly-laughing. They were close and easygoing in the way that comes with time. During the course of our conversation they both said that they believed in true love. But, after she had gone home and it was just the two of us, he said that, it's just that... she was not his true love.
It's easy to believe in true love when you haven't found it.
Oh yes baby, I'm starting early this year. What? Christmas shopping of course. Now everywhere I go I keep my eyes peeled for great, affordable, unique, beautiful gifts/giftwrap. Went to Expo book sale with Manager and Daiso and got almost 30% done, which I felt were good buys. So far spent about less than $150, including my posh handmade cards. Getting a headstart this year means that I'd be free to not-go shopping and feeling stressed about what to buy. The second round starts later this week on Fri. One more book sale at Expo plus a sports brand sale (Okay, it's Adidas) and... Loreal though I suspect I'd be buying more stuff for myself than anyone else. Still, managed to get nice titles last week, and just swooping off some others this week. I've already addressed and written my first batch of cards to pre-clients, so I'm left with clients, family and friends which, I think I will not be overstressed for time unless I plan to do something over-ambitious. Last year - every year it's always a rushed time for me, I hate squeezing with people at Orchard...
Last year I hand painted all my christmas cards... and made fudge for the first time.
It's going to be minimalist this year with really unhurried, beautiful wrapping for the books and gifts. Actually quite fun to hum around looking for that perfect ribbon and that nice wrapping paper and tissue slowly... I'm enjoying every bit of it.
It's quite sad when some people don't believe in love -in true love, and they say it like they mean it, jadedly, without strong emotion. For those who do, it's the little girl and boy in all of us that hopes for something better in life. Not just a 'power' marriage to better your life for money or biz, but a real, lasting marriage based on such a strong emotion that scientists cannot even define how it works and what triggers it. Many of us dream of a fairytale ending, and for those who do, I hope they find a happy ending where the rainbow ends. We still have what it takes!
Recently I had the pleasure of acquaintance with a lovely couple that seemed just about right for each other. J was a lovely girl, and M reminded me of Kie but none of the goofy-ness. He looked sleepy-eyed and talked slowly with witticisms sure to make you burst belly-laughing. They were close and easygoing in the way that comes with time. During the course of our conversation they both said that they believed in true love. But, after she had gone home and it was just the two of us, he said that, it's just that... she was not his true love.
It's easy to believe in true love when you haven't found it.
Oh yes baby, I'm starting early this year. What? Christmas shopping of course. Now everywhere I go I keep my eyes peeled for great, affordable, unique, beautiful gifts/giftwrap. Went to Expo book sale with Manager and Daiso and got almost 30% done, which I felt were good buys. So far spent about less than $150, including my posh handmade cards. Getting a headstart this year means that I'd be free to not-go shopping and feeling stressed about what to buy. The second round starts later this week on Fri. One more book sale at Expo plus a sports brand sale (Okay, it's Adidas) and... Loreal though I suspect I'd be buying more stuff for myself than anyone else. Still, managed to get nice titles last week, and just swooping off some others this week. I've already addressed and written my first batch of cards to pre-clients, so I'm left with clients, family and friends which, I think I will not be overstressed for time unless I plan to do something over-ambitious. Last year - every year it's always a rushed time for me, I hate squeezing with people at Orchard...
Last year I hand painted all my christmas cards... and made fudge for the first time.
It's going to be minimalist this year with really unhurried, beautiful wrapping for the books and gifts. Actually quite fun to hum around looking for that perfect ribbon and that nice wrapping paper and tissue slowly... I'm enjoying every bit of it.
It's quite sad when some people don't believe in love -in true love, and they say it like they mean it, jadedly, without strong emotion. For those who do, it's the little girl and boy in all of us that hopes for something better in life. Not just a 'power' marriage to better your life for money or biz, but a real, lasting marriage based on such a strong emotion that scientists cannot even define how it works and what triggers it. Many of us dream of a fairytale ending, and for those who do, I hope they find a happy ending where the rainbow ends. We still have what it takes!
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
The Proven Way to Avoid a "Loveless" Life
I may not provide the answers, just a direction to the Way. keke.
I've been subscribing to many free e-newsletters marketing various products, mainly to read up on the way they word things and how I can better put my tutelage of MY mother tongue into good use. Oh, and I don't usually open my mails (cannot afford spending too much time emailing, busy worker meeee) unless they have really GOOD titles. This one, from a writer of a self-help romance novel, really caught my eye. It says "The Proven Way to Avoid a "Loveless" Life". Wow. Being the skeptic that I am, I really wonder if this proves to be... well, accurate. Over the years I've learnt to distinguish the good eggs from the bad ones, but almost all the time, those gooey eyed gals turn a deaf ear. I have guy friends by the busloads, so I do know my stuff. I've saved one from a near heartbreak by immediately typecasting (and rightly so), her amour-to-be as a jerk type. And not long after, he went off chasing another skirt, and is now attached. I said to her most recently, if he loves you and is sincere he will wait. Well... less than a month is probably a track record for some.
Then, there are those type of girls that are clueless around men. Not telling them flirting is ok, but, being and moving in a feminine way, sometimes coquettish, pandering to the guy's ego, etc... Those girls who have only sisters and never had a best male bud are clueless so often I take it upon myself to educate them. I've seen types that I call "GWLV" - Girls who (easily)lose (their) virginity. Honestly! take it upon yourself not to be near those desperate, lusting creatures... not even sms naughthily with them. It's really dumb, and I'm sure they are worth more than that, but these girls are so easy, even I could easily woo and win them. I can tell for sure which are the GWLV types. Usually desperate with a capital D, they are so thankful any man would want to date them, usually those no-good types with body odour or some other unspeakable factor that would not endear them to the female population at large. These girls practically fling their whole lives at the feet of such slobs and to tell the truth, I don't think much of them either. Is such a worthless guy worth it, I ask. They quickly become an item, and, as if I can predict bad outcomings, quickly tire of each other. It's the guy, who, after having such an ego-boost, usually dumps her because now, he is full of self-confidence and ready to take on the world. The girl gets the short end of the straw because she loses out, loses everything. Once again, I'm not wishing this to happen to anyone but it usually is the case with such types. Also gay relationships. Always see a not-bad-looking one with a goddamn ugly one... turns out the ugly one is like domineering over him. Eventually he becomes "one-kind" too, just that all his super-nice and diplomatic friends are too sweet and understanding to tell him so. Me, I'd just disappear and not wipe up the tears. After all, I've said my piece already.
So, some hard questions from spiritedly's harddrive that you gotta ask yourself. Both parties included.
1. Is he a psychopath?
Some people have no feelings, it's bad if your would be husband turns out that way. The percentage of people being so is increasing rapidly. To find out, observe him - does he have any friends at all? How does he talk about his loved ones, any emotion? Etc...
2. Is he on the rebound?
From personal experience, rebound can be 1 month to 3 years depending on the scary EX. Well, just take the timing with a pinch of salt but don't over obsess over it as most of us tend to do... Having just broke up doesn't mean he's not ready, he's just giving excuses (haha), vice versa as well!
3. Is he ready/Are you ready?
For guys, rule of thumb is I'm ready when she's ready. For girls, rule of thumb is... I'm never 100% ready. So there...
4. Is he suitable for you?
While I've seen unbelievably unsuitable couples together, generally, he must suit you somehow... Don't wanna be long winded on this man.
5. Is it the right timing for both?
One of my friends got attached like the month before he was about to leave for oversea studies. Of course he'll be back, but it's a tough road to take. Many of my oversea good catch guys would rather not the girl be in this position. So they would prefer not to fall in love. Of course you can't control love. But if things get hot and heavy after the 2nd date, you need to keep things in perspective.
6. Does both share same values and beliefs in life?
This is the most important! I believe so... it's the fundamental of any relationship, even friendships. Deep ones.
Thanks~~
I've been subscribing to many free e-newsletters marketing various products, mainly to read up on the way they word things and how I can better put my tutelage of MY mother tongue into good use. Oh, and I don't usually open my mails (cannot afford spending too much time emailing, busy worker meeee) unless they have really GOOD titles. This one, from a writer of a self-help romance novel, really caught my eye. It says "The Proven Way to Avoid a "Loveless" Life". Wow. Being the skeptic that I am, I really wonder if this proves to be... well, accurate. Over the years I've learnt to distinguish the good eggs from the bad ones, but almost all the time, those gooey eyed gals turn a deaf ear. I have guy friends by the busloads, so I do know my stuff. I've saved one from a near heartbreak by immediately typecasting (and rightly so), her amour-to-be as a jerk type. And not long after, he went off chasing another skirt, and is now attached. I said to her most recently, if he loves you and is sincere he will wait. Well... less than a month is probably a track record for some.
Then, there are those type of girls that are clueless around men. Not telling them flirting is ok, but, being and moving in a feminine way, sometimes coquettish, pandering to the guy's ego, etc... Those girls who have only sisters and never had a best male bud are clueless so often I take it upon myself to educate them. I've seen types that I call "GWLV" - Girls who (easily)lose (their) virginity. Honestly! take it upon yourself not to be near those desperate, lusting creatures... not even sms naughthily with them. It's really dumb, and I'm sure they are worth more than that, but these girls are so easy, even I could easily woo and win them. I can tell for sure which are the GWLV types. Usually desperate with a capital D, they are so thankful any man would want to date them, usually those no-good types with body odour or some other unspeakable factor that would not endear them to the female population at large. These girls practically fling their whole lives at the feet of such slobs and to tell the truth, I don't think much of them either. Is such a worthless guy worth it, I ask. They quickly become an item, and, as if I can predict bad outcomings, quickly tire of each other. It's the guy, who, after having such an ego-boost, usually dumps her because now, he is full of self-confidence and ready to take on the world. The girl gets the short end of the straw because she loses out, loses everything. Once again, I'm not wishing this to happen to anyone but it usually is the case with such types. Also gay relationships. Always see a not-bad-looking one with a goddamn ugly one... turns out the ugly one is like domineering over him. Eventually he becomes "one-kind" too, just that all his super-nice and diplomatic friends are too sweet and understanding to tell him so. Me, I'd just disappear and not wipe up the tears. After all, I've said my piece already.
So, some hard questions from spiritedly's harddrive that you gotta ask yourself. Both parties included.
1. Is he a psychopath?
Some people have no feelings, it's bad if your would be husband turns out that way. The percentage of people being so is increasing rapidly. To find out, observe him - does he have any friends at all? How does he talk about his loved ones, any emotion? Etc...
2. Is he on the rebound?
From personal experience, rebound can be 1 month to 3 years depending on the scary EX. Well, just take the timing with a pinch of salt but don't over obsess over it as most of us tend to do... Having just broke up doesn't mean he's not ready, he's just giving excuses (haha), vice versa as well!
3. Is he ready/Are you ready?
For guys, rule of thumb is I'm ready when she's ready. For girls, rule of thumb is... I'm never 100% ready. So there...
4. Is he suitable for you?
While I've seen unbelievably unsuitable couples together, generally, he must suit you somehow... Don't wanna be long winded on this man.
5. Is it the right timing for both?
One of my friends got attached like the month before he was about to leave for oversea studies. Of course he'll be back, but it's a tough road to take. Many of my oversea good catch guys would rather not the girl be in this position. So they would prefer not to fall in love. Of course you can't control love. But if things get hot and heavy after the 2nd date, you need to keep things in perspective.
6. Does both share same values and beliefs in life?
This is the most important! I believe so... it's the fundamental of any relationship, even friendships. Deep ones.
Thanks~~
Monday, November 13, 2006
Tenacity -not so easy to find nowadays
A general satire about recent things I've been impressed by.
I've been told I'm someone who can read into the future.
Well, maybe not in the psychic sense; but I do believe I am a visionary.
Sometimes I already know how some people's future will turn out. Others, I'm not so sure. There are some people in my life who are destined to a lifetime of labour. I think of them like horses, or cows... just slogging up and down from day to day, tired out, and probably die that way. There's nothing wrong with that, I suppose they are just made like that. Others' future seems not so certain - in other words, they can either make it or break it... depending on what they choose right now to do. I'm amazed by some of my office colleagues - 'loser guys'. Not being mean here but when your income is based on sales, and you spend the whole day - the whole week surfing the net - what does that make you? Honestly, their behaviour gives me entertainment in the office. It's almost as though you can read their mind. One even commented that they should go to a particular church in Expo to network and find prospects!!
And go to the motorshow to talk to people... harebrained schemes. Honestly, I can't see their future in The Company right now.
As Singaporeans sometimes we don't dare to speak up. And those who do, are quickly annihilated. For me, I don't usually have a strong stand on things though I do get irritated easily. When I see things going bad I guess I just take a far off observer's point of view rather than to go and mingle and get my hands dirty. Different strokes for different folks. Sometimes when we do things out of goodwill it is often miscontrued. So, to save the heartbreak and to focus on those who are really teachable I shall just let some things run its course.
I've been inpsired this past week by certain extraordinary people who inspire with their lives. One, a guy my Rich Dad knows. He has been working for a certain airline as an engineer for 20 years and recently retired. The flabbergasting thing is that he is actually colorblind. Severely colorblind...He sees the leaves on the tree as though Singapore is autumn all year round.
So when they had a pass-out examination, he was required to just sort out a bunch of wires. He honestly said, he can't do it. He could only do it if he was told beforehand which color belonged to which... I think this is tenacity in the face of 'disability'. Which makes me scorn the loser guys I see daily, because they are young and incapable.
Another one is my church friend, a lady who works in a voluntary government organization. Not many would choose to work in places like this because of the really meagre pay. Her story is shown on the Yellow Ribbon's True Life Story this week. Carol is about 2 years older than me and long time ago I remember we prayed for each other. She mentioned to me that she was an orphan and I was rather shocked by that, because I don't know any orphans, not in Singapore anyways. Well... her story is aired this week and I heard her speak in the blurb, that her Dad left the family when she was one-year old, and her mother committed suicide when she was 7. Maybe you feel pity for her. She could be someone who just depends on the Government to feed her for the rest of her life, but she has been a youth leader in church for many years now, and her maturity beyond years just speak of the way she also handled difficulties with tenacity. It's already not easy growing up with a family, I cannot imagine being all alone.
Tenacity... I find this really hard to find nowadays.
I've been told I'm someone who can read into the future.
Well, maybe not in the psychic sense; but I do believe I am a visionary.
Sometimes I already know how some people's future will turn out. Others, I'm not so sure. There are some people in my life who are destined to a lifetime of labour. I think of them like horses, or cows... just slogging up and down from day to day, tired out, and probably die that way. There's nothing wrong with that, I suppose they are just made like that. Others' future seems not so certain - in other words, they can either make it or break it... depending on what they choose right now to do. I'm amazed by some of my office colleagues - 'loser guys'. Not being mean here but when your income is based on sales, and you spend the whole day - the whole week surfing the net - what does that make you? Honestly, their behaviour gives me entertainment in the office. It's almost as though you can read their mind. One even commented that they should go to a particular church in Expo to network and find prospects!!
And go to the motorshow to talk to people... harebrained schemes. Honestly, I can't see their future in The Company right now.
As Singaporeans sometimes we don't dare to speak up. And those who do, are quickly annihilated. For me, I don't usually have a strong stand on things though I do get irritated easily. When I see things going bad I guess I just take a far off observer's point of view rather than to go and mingle and get my hands dirty. Different strokes for different folks. Sometimes when we do things out of goodwill it is often miscontrued. So, to save the heartbreak and to focus on those who are really teachable I shall just let some things run its course.
I've been inpsired this past week by certain extraordinary people who inspire with their lives. One, a guy my Rich Dad knows. He has been working for a certain airline as an engineer for 20 years and recently retired. The flabbergasting thing is that he is actually colorblind. Severely colorblind...He sees the leaves on the tree as though Singapore is autumn all year round.
So when they had a pass-out examination, he was required to just sort out a bunch of wires. He honestly said, he can't do it. He could only do it if he was told beforehand which color belonged to which... I think this is tenacity in the face of 'disability'. Which makes me scorn the loser guys I see daily, because they are young and incapable.
Another one is my church friend, a lady who works in a voluntary government organization. Not many would choose to work in places like this because of the really meagre pay. Her story is shown on the Yellow Ribbon's True Life Story this week. Carol is about 2 years older than me and long time ago I remember we prayed for each other. She mentioned to me that she was an orphan and I was rather shocked by that, because I don't know any orphans, not in Singapore anyways. Well... her story is aired this week and I heard her speak in the blurb, that her Dad left the family when she was one-year old, and her mother committed suicide when she was 7. Maybe you feel pity for her. She could be someone who just depends on the Government to feed her for the rest of her life, but she has been a youth leader in church for many years now, and her maturity beyond years just speak of the way she also handled difficulties with tenacity. It's already not easy growing up with a family, I cannot imagine being all alone.
Tenacity... I find this really hard to find nowadays.
Thursday, November 09, 2006
What's next
There are so many things to worry about yet there are so many to be happy about. I'm funny that way. Maybe I think in advance for the future, perhaps a little resentful that it's not to be in our control and things may slide either way. I am hopeful that life is taking a turn for the better, yet strangely there are always setbacks. Small little notes of doubt that may cause unexplained worry.
It's fun to meet others who are also living the carefree life, people with time for tea and no hurry in between, able to leave their work duties almost anytime. I've been meeting people like that and I think one character trait that is evident in them all shows: that they care for people. A people person usually don't meet up for tea with ulterior motives, or to constantly talk about their latest product. Instead, we meet to learn from each other, to motivate each other, to get some tips - "What is a good brand for skincare? Where is a good place to buy a house?" Stuff like that. Tea time for me is a time to slow down and take charge of the biz I'm doing, the events happening, to plan, to chill and to get to know and learn from others. I'm a big fan of Caltex House, having met most people at the Kaya Toast place or other tea places. With avocado juice in hand, watching the busy executives rush their way by to various appointments. I'm a sucker for treating people with respect. I always do surveys even though I know it's probably some stuff I won't be interested in. But it's through these that you get to meet really nice people too. And I do learn from them lots. It's been said that if you want to do sales you can make a living, but if you provide good service, you'll last a lifetime. I will give that WOW factor to my clients even though it means spending that extra time.
Being very task oriented at work, normally when I come in I just plonk down my stuff and do my self-assigned tasks of the day, not really caring about who and what. I do scorn the ones who just surf the net the entire day, and reading up on topics about sales and whatnot. Honestly, I've been observing some guys in my area who just comes everyday and never making a single call. I'm not one to judge but I do wonder how they get by. And lately they have been getting on my nerves by the noise they make and the disturbances they cause. I remember when I was speaking on the phone to a prospect they were oohing and aahing over a new project launch over my head. I could probably box them there and then but I gave a killer glare and told them to be quiet. It was peaceful for the next hour or so, and then they continued again. I don't understand why they like to waste time doing nothing in the office when every little time is important to me... especially when it seems like each week passes by so fast! Also, I'm blessed beyond grace to have capable mentors who always lead me to greater heights. I realise that I've wasted time in the past and now I want to make the most out of it. Yet I do have the asset of time on my side. I'd never go into my own biz now because I know the odds of making it. Though I do hope to have a venture capitalist by my side and start a retail chain of sorts that works bigtime.
It's important at this juncture to maintain relationships and build new ones. We are shaped by the people we like to meet, and the people around us. I want to make sure of my early retirement in comfort. Honestly I'm pissed when people say, oh, I get good clients because of my good looks or it's so easy. Yeah, try it yourself. I've met so many people without even closing deals, but at least I can say for myself that I did put in effort, I did work hard. Even in relationships, our most important decision of choosing a life partner, it won't work out if we don't work hard at it. It seems nonsense to me to hear people saying that they are tired, they have tried... When all they do is nothing.
It's fun to meet others who are also living the carefree life, people with time for tea and no hurry in between, able to leave their work duties almost anytime. I've been meeting people like that and I think one character trait that is evident in them all shows: that they care for people. A people person usually don't meet up for tea with ulterior motives, or to constantly talk about their latest product. Instead, we meet to learn from each other, to motivate each other, to get some tips - "What is a good brand for skincare? Where is a good place to buy a house?" Stuff like that. Tea time for me is a time to slow down and take charge of the biz I'm doing, the events happening, to plan, to chill and to get to know and learn from others. I'm a big fan of Caltex House, having met most people at the Kaya Toast place or other tea places. With avocado juice in hand, watching the busy executives rush their way by to various appointments. I'm a sucker for treating people with respect. I always do surveys even though I know it's probably some stuff I won't be interested in. But it's through these that you get to meet really nice people too. And I do learn from them lots. It's been said that if you want to do sales you can make a living, but if you provide good service, you'll last a lifetime. I will give that WOW factor to my clients even though it means spending that extra time.
Being very task oriented at work, normally when I come in I just plonk down my stuff and do my self-assigned tasks of the day, not really caring about who and what. I do scorn the ones who just surf the net the entire day, and reading up on topics about sales and whatnot. Honestly, I've been observing some guys in my area who just comes everyday and never making a single call. I'm not one to judge but I do wonder how they get by. And lately they have been getting on my nerves by the noise they make and the disturbances they cause. I remember when I was speaking on the phone to a prospect they were oohing and aahing over a new project launch over my head. I could probably box them there and then but I gave a killer glare and told them to be quiet. It was peaceful for the next hour or so, and then they continued again. I don't understand why they like to waste time doing nothing in the office when every little time is important to me... especially when it seems like each week passes by so fast! Also, I'm blessed beyond grace to have capable mentors who always lead me to greater heights. I realise that I've wasted time in the past and now I want to make the most out of it. Yet I do have the asset of time on my side. I'd never go into my own biz now because I know the odds of making it. Though I do hope to have a venture capitalist by my side and start a retail chain of sorts that works bigtime.
It's important at this juncture to maintain relationships and build new ones. We are shaped by the people we like to meet, and the people around us. I want to make sure of my early retirement in comfort. Honestly I'm pissed when people say, oh, I get good clients because of my good looks or it's so easy. Yeah, try it yourself. I've met so many people without even closing deals, but at least I can say for myself that I did put in effort, I did work hard. Even in relationships, our most important decision of choosing a life partner, it won't work out if we don't work hard at it. It seems nonsense to me to hear people saying that they are tired, they have tried... When all they do is nothing.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
Opportunity to change your bank account.
The end of 06 is coming and it's been a great two months for me. I've not yet reached the tipping point to easily become a millionaire but the hard work I've put in since last year has borne fruit. Now, easily I find a life of ease and as my time expands, the ability to do many things I once could not.
Mingling with the entrupreneurs-to-be and the -already also makes me realise one thing: That I am also in this league. It is so important to find a mentor before you can become one. And then later, hopefully train another. I've had good mentors, uncles, my Rich Dad, Manager, etc who find it a pleasure to spend time answering my questions and guiding me along. Maybe I'm blessed that way,but also, I was looking for them. I've seen a few people saying "If only I've started when I was your age, I would have become really rich now." To change a society, educate lives. And I can go where no pastor can go: To touch and change the lives of successful businessmen like myself, if I am successful too. Was having fun writing some goals that I want to achieve by December 2006. It seems so soon that writing the bigger ones would make me demoralized. Still, goals are a big part of how or what we want to achieve in life.
Goals are to people what biz plan is to businessmen.
Was sharing with Penelope yesterday that any goal can be 'spiritual' or 'materialistic'. If I want to earn a million bucks, who is going to say anything if I give half of it away? Money gives us freedom if we do not have to work for it. For some people, even if they are faithful to the company, working years, slogging day and night - will they see a doubling of their income? No... perhaps never. That is why I like sales. You have the opportunity to change your bank account if you are hardworking. Hard work never killed anyone!
I've learnt that it's quite easy to do sales if you partner with the right company and product. I've seen people work so hard for a miserly sum when they could do the same amount of work and earn way better selling another type of thing. Some products work well in direct sales, others are suited for retail. Selling things can be fun if you like it and have a bit of thick skin in asking people if they want it.
Today's workers really need multiple sources of income if they want to survive. I'm glad I can bank on my diverse talents. Besides being in a job that pays well, I can also have the time to teach part time with a really decent sum. Plus, I can join any one of those health products out there (But I will join the best one) as I'm slim and actually eat really healthy foods. So I'm a bit of expert in that. I can also write, and design, so that also attributes to some on-off projects which I do enjoy doing for free most of the time. I'm starting to invest in things with good returns instead of always spending on consumer goods so that I can get a good value for my hard work and money next time.
I hope that I can share with others how to change their lives.
Mingling with the entrupreneurs-to-be and the -already also makes me realise one thing: That I am also in this league. It is so important to find a mentor before you can become one. And then later, hopefully train another. I've had good mentors, uncles, my Rich Dad, Manager, etc who find it a pleasure to spend time answering my questions and guiding me along. Maybe I'm blessed that way,but also, I was looking for them. I've seen a few people saying "If only I've started when I was your age, I would have become really rich now." To change a society, educate lives. And I can go where no pastor can go: To touch and change the lives of successful businessmen like myself, if I am successful too. Was having fun writing some goals that I want to achieve by December 2006. It seems so soon that writing the bigger ones would make me demoralized. Still, goals are a big part of how or what we want to achieve in life.
Goals are to people what biz plan is to businessmen.
Was sharing with Penelope yesterday that any goal can be 'spiritual' or 'materialistic'. If I want to earn a million bucks, who is going to say anything if I give half of it away? Money gives us freedom if we do not have to work for it. For some people, even if they are faithful to the company, working years, slogging day and night - will they see a doubling of their income? No... perhaps never. That is why I like sales. You have the opportunity to change your bank account if you are hardworking. Hard work never killed anyone!
I've learnt that it's quite easy to do sales if you partner with the right company and product. I've seen people work so hard for a miserly sum when they could do the same amount of work and earn way better selling another type of thing. Some products work well in direct sales, others are suited for retail. Selling things can be fun if you like it and have a bit of thick skin in asking people if they want it.
Today's workers really need multiple sources of income if they want to survive. I'm glad I can bank on my diverse talents. Besides being in a job that pays well, I can also have the time to teach part time with a really decent sum. Plus, I can join any one of those health products out there (But I will join the best one) as I'm slim and actually eat really healthy foods. So I'm a bit of expert in that. I can also write, and design, so that also attributes to some on-off projects which I do enjoy doing for free most of the time. I'm starting to invest in things with good returns instead of always spending on consumer goods so that I can get a good value for my hard work and money next time.
I hope that I can share with others how to change their lives.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Wisecracks about men, women, and all that
A little light humor from me while trawling the web.
Enjoy a good Friday laugh for a great weekend!
I asked my wife if she'd love me when I was old and useless. She said, "Of course I do"
- Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Cats do what they want, when they want.
They rarely listen to you.
They're totally unpredictable.
They whine when they are not happy.
When you want to play they want to be left alone.
When you want to be alone, they want to play.
They expect you to cater to their every whim.
They're moody.
They leave their hair everywhere.
They drive you nuts.
Conclusion: Cats are little, tiny women in cheap fur coats.
My wife says I never listen to her.
At least I think that's what she said.
There were 11 people hanging on to a rope that came down from a helicopter. Ten were men and one woman. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go. Finally the woman gave a really touching speech on how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children and giving in to men. All of the men started clapping.
My husband bought me a mood ring the other day. When I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead.
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
One day, Adam sat outside the Garden of Eden shortly after eating the apple, and wondered about men and women. So looking up to the heavens he says, "Excuse me God, can I ask you a few questions?"
God replied, "Go on Adam, but be quick. I have a world to create."
So Adam says," When you created Eve, why did You make her body so curvy and tender unlike mine?"
"I did that, Adam, so that you could love her."
"Oh, well then, why did You give her long, shiny, beautiful hair, and not me?"
"I did that Adam so that you could love her."
"Oh, well then, why did You make her so stupid? Certainly not so that I could love her?" "Well Adam, No. I did that so that she could love you."
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married?
Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman. I guess that I have been looking for the perfect girl."
"Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least one girl that you wanted to marry."
"Yes, there was a girl, once. I guess she was the one perfect girl - the only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me." replied the gent.
"Well, why didn't you marry her," asked his friend.
The gent replied, "She was looking for the perfect man."
How Dogs and Men Are the Same
Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both like to chew wood.
Both mark their territory.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
Both tend to smell riper with age.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.
Neither does any dishes.
Both fart shamelessly.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Both like dominance games.
Both are suspicious of the postman.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.
Enjoy a good Friday laugh for a great weekend!
I asked my wife if she'd love me when I was old and useless. She said, "Of course I do"
- Rodney Dangerfield
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Cats do what they want, when they want.
They rarely listen to you.
They're totally unpredictable.
They whine when they are not happy.
When you want to play they want to be left alone.
When you want to be alone, they want to play.
They expect you to cater to their every whim.
They're moody.
They leave their hair everywhere.
They drive you nuts.
Conclusion: Cats are little, tiny women in cheap fur coats.
My wife says I never listen to her.
At least I think that's what she said.
There were 11 people hanging on to a rope that came down from a helicopter. Ten were men and one woman. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn’t, the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go. Finally the woman gave a really touching speech on how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children and giving in to men. All of the men started clapping.
My husband bought me a mood ring the other day. When I'm in a good mood it turns green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on his forehead.
Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; and then it was too late."
The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
One day, Adam sat outside the Garden of Eden shortly after eating the apple, and wondered about men and women. So looking up to the heavens he says, "Excuse me God, can I ask you a few questions?"
God replied, "Go on Adam, but be quick. I have a world to create."
So Adam says," When you created Eve, why did You make her body so curvy and tender unlike mine?"
"I did that, Adam, so that you could love her."
"Oh, well then, why did You give her long, shiny, beautiful hair, and not me?"
"I did that Adam so that you could love her."
"Oh, well then, why did You make her so stupid? Certainly not so that I could love her?" "Well Adam, No. I did that so that she could love you."
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?
Woman: Unfertilized.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: But would you stay there?
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
A friend asked a gentleman how it is that he never married?
Replied the gentleman, "Well, I guess I just never met the right woman. I guess that I have been looking for the perfect girl."
"Oh, come on now," said the friend, "Surely you have met at least one girl that you wanted to marry."
"Yes, there was a girl, once. I guess she was the one perfect girl - the only perfect girl I really ever met. She was just the right everything. I really mean that she was the perfect girl for me." replied the gent.
"Well, why didn't you marry her," asked his friend.
The gent replied, "She was looking for the perfect man."
How Dogs and Men Are the Same
Both take up too much space on the bed.
Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
Both are threatened by their own kind.
Both like to chew wood.
Both mark their territory.
Both are bad at asking you questions.
Neither tells you what's bothering them.
Both tend to smell riper with age.
The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
Both have an inordinate fascination with women's crotches.
Neither does any dishes.
Both fart shamelessly.
Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
Both like dominance games.
Both are suspicious of the postman.
Neither knows how to talk on the telephone.
Neither understands what you see in cats.
Monday, October 23, 2006
The Dilemma
Just wondering...
How come the hope we have is short lived when faced with grim reality?
Why some christians don't believe God will heal?
And also not speak life into their circumstances but condemn it already by their demoralised words...
Why is this world so full of entertainment that does not glorify God?
And all of us thinks its great to keep watching the movies and listening to songs, once wholesome now with very dubious themes.
Even what we eat has changed. The decadence of this world, the westernisation of places we once loved. Food, a staple - should be a healthy staple. I need more balanced choices please. How come we have more and more choices but no better alternatives. Why do we lust for the latest technology when ours is still working fine? I only changed my mobile phone when my old one's hearing device was wonky and I couldn't store any more contacts. Yet it seems frivolous, even snobbish, to some for me, a youngster, to have such a 'good' and expensive looking phone. Oh? This is actually the second phone I ever bought in my lifetime - I have a good Daddy who blesses me with more than enough Nokias the past years. So considering that I've saved quite a lot these past years... ...
My point is, I think advertisements and the media play too huge a part in our lives. Why are we all hyped up about the latest movie, the newest techonology, the newly released single by some wannabe popstar with a glam mug but less than appealing vocals... the new perfume, or some skincare product hawked by some movie star. Is it really that good? Are we buying it because we like the product and it works or is it more bang and less buck?
The Dilemma of our times is not that we are indecisive.
It's that we have TOO MANY choices.
And in relationships as well. Once upon our parents' time they practically married the first or second boy that asked them out. The generation before that, even better. They only got to see their other half on the wedding day itself, in most marriages. So you inevitably end up with someone taller or thinner than you yuck. Now, we are spoilt for choices. It is not uncommon to hear of several ex-boyfriends (or several failed relationships) before marriage.
We can choose our partner from our workplace, church, relatives, social groups, if all else fails there is still the internet. bigchurch.com , sdu.com , friendfinder... Yet if this theory of 'having more choices is better' works out, how come our world sees more divorces, more affairs, more broken families and children getting depressed. One can argue that choice spoils us.
Even something so simple as choosing a mobile phone. There are 6 brands of pda touchscreen phones with different functions for different usage and operating systems. Inevitably, once we made that choice, we don't feel as if it's the BEST choice. Just a better choice out of the many, many choices we can otherwise make. Thus, the sense of insceurity - That others will say, why didn't you buy X ... or Y? And then you have to make a stand. The same goes for shopping for groceries, buying hairdye - there are at least 5 different brands to choose from. Choice spoils us, it makes us critical of other people's choices and we are often unsure that we have chosen the best.
That is why a good, loving God gave us ONLY two choices. Black or white, Truth or Lies. Follow me and be saved. Or choose not, and the option is death. We have to choose. We have a choice. Not choosing anything means you inevitably lose out in the game of life. The dilemma of the day is to choose something worthwhile.
Man, I should be a sociologist... ...
How come the hope we have is short lived when faced with grim reality?
Why some christians don't believe God will heal?
And also not speak life into their circumstances but condemn it already by their demoralised words...
Why is this world so full of entertainment that does not glorify God?
And all of us thinks its great to keep watching the movies and listening to songs, once wholesome now with very dubious themes.
Even what we eat has changed. The decadence of this world, the westernisation of places we once loved. Food, a staple - should be a healthy staple. I need more balanced choices please. How come we have more and more choices but no better alternatives. Why do we lust for the latest technology when ours is still working fine? I only changed my mobile phone when my old one's hearing device was wonky and I couldn't store any more contacts. Yet it seems frivolous, even snobbish, to some for me, a youngster, to have such a 'good' and expensive looking phone. Oh? This is actually the second phone I ever bought in my lifetime - I have a good Daddy who blesses me with more than enough Nokias the past years. So considering that I've saved quite a lot these past years... ...
My point is, I think advertisements and the media play too huge a part in our lives. Why are we all hyped up about the latest movie, the newest techonology, the newly released single by some wannabe popstar with a glam mug but less than appealing vocals... the new perfume, or some skincare product hawked by some movie star. Is it really that good? Are we buying it because we like the product and it works or is it more bang and less buck?
The Dilemma of our times is not that we are indecisive.
It's that we have TOO MANY choices.
And in relationships as well. Once upon our parents' time they practically married the first or second boy that asked them out. The generation before that, even better. They only got to see their other half on the wedding day itself, in most marriages. So you inevitably end up with someone taller or thinner than you yuck. Now, we are spoilt for choices. It is not uncommon to hear of several ex-boyfriends (or several failed relationships) before marriage.
We can choose our partner from our workplace, church, relatives, social groups, if all else fails there is still the internet. bigchurch.com , sdu.com , friendfinder... Yet if this theory of 'having more choices is better' works out, how come our world sees more divorces, more affairs, more broken families and children getting depressed. One can argue that choice spoils us.
Even something so simple as choosing a mobile phone. There are 6 brands of pda touchscreen phones with different functions for different usage and operating systems. Inevitably, once we made that choice, we don't feel as if it's the BEST choice. Just a better choice out of the many, many choices we can otherwise make. Thus, the sense of insceurity - That others will say, why didn't you buy X ... or Y? And then you have to make a stand. The same goes for shopping for groceries, buying hairdye - there are at least 5 different brands to choose from. Choice spoils us, it makes us critical of other people's choices and we are often unsure that we have chosen the best.
That is why a good, loving God gave us ONLY two choices. Black or white, Truth or Lies. Follow me and be saved. Or choose not, and the option is death. We have to choose. We have a choice. Not choosing anything means you inevitably lose out in the game of life. The dilemma of the day is to choose something worthwhile.
Man, I should be a sociologist... ...
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
One minute millionaire book
I want Lindt's cointreau chocolates. And some time to myself to laze at home.
Why choose to be sad when you can be happy? Why choose to be a victim of the circumstances when you can be a victor in every way. Some people like to push their unhappiness, work stressors, complaints to other people - more often than not it's the ones you are supposed to cherish. What you think is what you will become. I often wonder why some people complain so much. The food takes too long to come, the weather is not to their exact liking, blah blah. If you complain too much you will look old. Man... collagen implants anyone? Then again they do not realise how grating their voice sounds when complaining over this and that. Nuff said, I will take time to think of a positive daily affirmation for myself. I want a nice mid sized house with grass for rabbits and maybe cats and whippets. I want to breathe fresh air daily and eat organic whenever affordable. I want some nice dresses and bags and tech accessories. I want personalised stuff. Yesssss...
Words transform. Any situation - use your mouth to speak a blessing or a curse, a healing or an acceptance of sickness, bring joy or insult. You choose. I've chosen.
So here's a little precious, my genius list.
MY GENIUS LIST
PASSION : WHAT DO I LOVE TO DO?
What activities give me satisfaction?
What excites me about my life?
What is my secret ambition?
What are my hobbies?
TALENT : WHAT AM I GOOD AT?
What do I get complimented on?
Where have I excelled in the past?
Where have I been successful?
What are some of my strengths?
VALUES : WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO ME?
What would I do if I were wealthy?
What do I stand for?
What won't I stand for?
What would I risk my life for?
DESTINY : WHAT WAS I BORN TO DO?
What is my unique mission in life?
What does God want me to do?
What are my unique opportunities?
Where can I make a difference?
Do I have what it takes (to be a millionaire?) Do you?
Why choose to be sad when you can be happy? Why choose to be a victim of the circumstances when you can be a victor in every way. Some people like to push their unhappiness, work stressors, complaints to other people - more often than not it's the ones you are supposed to cherish. What you think is what you will become. I often wonder why some people complain so much. The food takes too long to come, the weather is not to their exact liking, blah blah. If you complain too much you will look old. Man... collagen implants anyone? Then again they do not realise how grating their voice sounds when complaining over this and that. Nuff said, I will take time to think of a positive daily affirmation for myself. I want a nice mid sized house with grass for rabbits and maybe cats and whippets. I want to breathe fresh air daily and eat organic whenever affordable. I want some nice dresses and bags and tech accessories. I want personalised stuff. Yesssss...
Words transform. Any situation - use your mouth to speak a blessing or a curse, a healing or an acceptance of sickness, bring joy or insult. You choose. I've chosen.
So here's a little precious, my genius list.
MY GENIUS LIST
PASSION : WHAT DO I LOVE TO DO?
What activities give me satisfaction?
What excites me about my life?
What is my secret ambition?
What are my hobbies?
TALENT : WHAT AM I GOOD AT?
What do I get complimented on?
Where have I excelled in the past?
Where have I been successful?
What are some of my strengths?
VALUES : WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO ME?
What would I do if I were wealthy?
What do I stand for?
What won't I stand for?
What would I risk my life for?
DESTINY : WHAT WAS I BORN TO DO?
What is my unique mission in life?
What does God want me to do?
What are my unique opportunities?
Where can I make a difference?
Do I have what it takes (to be a millionaire?) Do you?
Tuesday, October 17, 2006
My first investment and good service
Yup.
I'm a forex investor! Haha.
I invested $XXX to buy Iraqi dinar (check out www.mydinar.net )
If we as christians believe that 'Babylon' will rise up again as a world superpower, plus the location of old Babylon should be the same as the new one (some preachers and scholars say), then, let's put our money where we believe! Well, I'm not that high a risk taker so I only invested $XXX (In fact my new bag costs more than that, oops.) The most if it's worthless I can go Jerusalem and buy a magic carpet.
But if each dinar reaches $1 USD I shall be very riche indeedy. =) hee.
I aim to invest almost everything that comes into the bank.
Actually I'd rather spend most of it but wahla... should save some for rainy days.
Was thinking about good service - my darling mentioned that I am such a sucker for good service. Well it's true. Maybe because I too provide good, efficient, friendly service to my clients. Efficient in the very least. But some restaurants here in Singapore are bad. Very bad. So bad that I think they should hire 'mystery diners' to solve their problem. Granted, service staff are hard to find and sometimes it's the internal training problem. But even if you have good food and lousy service, I'd rather eat at one with mediocre food and excellent service.
So here are my gourmet GEMs picks of the season. Make your date a happy and meaningful experience by going to these places!
Wheelock Place
1. Sun with Moon restaurant at Wheelock Place - Japanese food - I called in advance for reservation and they immediately ushered me to a small cosy wonderful table. Even though the table was situated far-off, every wave of the hand was answered promptly, staff were friendly, it was the most pleasant dinner experience ever...
2. NYDC Wheelock - Friendly service staff, I could say over enthusiatic! One friend complained her pasta was slightly dry, not expecting them to give her a totally new one! They kept refilling our glasses before it was half empty and although it was full house, they had enough staff to keep all happy. Wonderful experience!
3. Sakae, Wheelock - Called in advance on a Friday evening where the queue was 20-odd. Felt like a princess when the manager granted my request and we were ushered in to a nice seat. Food was prompt and the manager is a really nice lady!
Maybe the whole Wheelock is well trained in service!
Excellent service elsewhere:
Ichiban Boshi at Esplanade and Novena Square
Sixth Ave 'zhi char stall'
Bad, bad bad service elsewhere:
Sakae at Marina Square - Waited for the soup so long (it's self-cook soup so they only needed to prepare the ingredients) that we just paid and left. Manager pretended he was busy and requests went unnoticed many times.
Cedele Bakery Depot at Suntec - Rude waiters who knew nothing about their pastries (not even how to pronounce raspberry pistachio) and grumpy, kept talking loudy to themselves
Cedele at Raffles City - Kept announcing they were closing like 30minutes in advance as though they couldn't wait to get rid of us. Although the Cedele at Republic Plaza was terrific.
Ok. Seems like I go to many restaurants.
I'm a forex investor! Haha.
I invested $XXX to buy Iraqi dinar (check out www.mydinar.net )
If we as christians believe that 'Babylon' will rise up again as a world superpower, plus the location of old Babylon should be the same as the new one (some preachers and scholars say), then, let's put our money where we believe! Well, I'm not that high a risk taker so I only invested $XXX (In fact my new bag costs more than that, oops.) The most if it's worthless I can go Jerusalem and buy a magic carpet.
But if each dinar reaches $1 USD I shall be very riche indeedy. =) hee.
I aim to invest almost everything that comes into the bank.
Actually I'd rather spend most of it but wahla... should save some for rainy days.
Was thinking about good service - my darling mentioned that I am such a sucker for good service. Well it's true. Maybe because I too provide good, efficient, friendly service to my clients. Efficient in the very least. But some restaurants here in Singapore are bad. Very bad. So bad that I think they should hire 'mystery diners' to solve their problem. Granted, service staff are hard to find and sometimes it's the internal training problem. But even if you have good food and lousy service, I'd rather eat at one with mediocre food and excellent service.
So here are my gourmet GEMs picks of the season. Make your date a happy and meaningful experience by going to these places!
Wheelock Place
1. Sun with Moon restaurant at Wheelock Place - Japanese food - I called in advance for reservation and they immediately ushered me to a small cosy wonderful table. Even though the table was situated far-off, every wave of the hand was answered promptly, staff were friendly, it was the most pleasant dinner experience ever...
2. NYDC Wheelock - Friendly service staff, I could say over enthusiatic! One friend complained her pasta was slightly dry, not expecting them to give her a totally new one! They kept refilling our glasses before it was half empty and although it was full house, they had enough staff to keep all happy. Wonderful experience!
3. Sakae, Wheelock - Called in advance on a Friday evening where the queue was 20-odd. Felt like a princess when the manager granted my request and we were ushered in to a nice seat. Food was prompt and the manager is a really nice lady!
Maybe the whole Wheelock is well trained in service!
Excellent service elsewhere:
Ichiban Boshi at Esplanade and Novena Square
Sixth Ave 'zhi char stall'
Bad, bad bad service elsewhere:
Sakae at Marina Square - Waited for the soup so long (it's self-cook soup so they only needed to prepare the ingredients) that we just paid and left. Manager pretended he was busy and requests went unnoticed many times.
Cedele Bakery Depot at Suntec - Rude waiters who knew nothing about their pastries (not even how to pronounce raspberry pistachio) and grumpy, kept talking loudy to themselves
Cedele at Raffles City - Kept announcing they were closing like 30minutes in advance as though they couldn't wait to get rid of us. Although the Cedele at Republic Plaza was terrific.
Ok. Seems like I go to many restaurants.
Thursday, October 12, 2006
In dreams
If your heart is like my heart, then give me your hand. -John Wesley.
Some days are darker than the rest.
It's hard not to be so affected. I get affected easily by surroundings, by the haze. Makes me feel so 'heaty' inside, tons of water still does not quench the feeling of wanting to be in airconditioned atmospheres all the time - the one time where I prefer aircon to sunlight outside.
Had a disturbing dream - almost a nightmare two nights ago. Strangely I only remember one scene - although the rest of them is stuck near the back of my mind, playfully showing me snatches here and there but not exactly how, causing me to wonder if my memory of the dream was made up or was it really there...?
A chill went down my spine however, as I realised I was freed from this sort of dreams for years. Well truth be told I was not as frightened or remember it as poignantly as I had for previous ones. But the nuances are the same. Running away from something again. It's always running and running and I hate running. It's hard to pinpoint people with a soul like mine because sometimes they don't even know it themselves. I only realised it in the last few years but I've always known since I was a kid that I thought differently from other kids. Not that it's supered intelligent thinking, or even something to be proud of; no. It's a kind of unexplainable soulful, nonconventional thinking that just causes us to view the world in a different light. Some psychologists have a word for it - I forgot the term...But it's just used to describe people with an 'enlightened' sense of thinking, they they are able to connect within themselves - and come up with deep theories like Stephen Hawking's - or if they are inclined artistically - like John Wesley, cofounder of the Methodist movement. Every religion (except mine, perhaps) has an explanation for these souls. Buddhism calls them enlightened beings, with a boddisathvic (if there is that word) state of mind, born like this. New age calls them psychic, people with 'auras', heightened sense of being etc. I'm not into those spooky stuff but there are a couple of instances I sensed deeply certain things and insisted I was right and it turned out so.
Anyways, I never embraced this side of me, I just wanted to be like other normal people. Sort of like X-men. But I am slowly opening up to the fact that there are others in my midst who feel this deep sense of loneliness that no one else can ever understand them too. In fact, we don't want to understand ourselves, we will go crazy if we do! So, I'm not sure why I am like that but I believe someday my 'powers' will come forth to help me in some way, meanwhile, I just express myself through doing everyday things. I hope that my disturbing dreams are lessened though.
When the cold of winter comes
Starless night will cover day
In the veiling of the sun
We will walk in bitter rain
But in dreams
I can hear your name
And in dreams
We will meet again
When the seas and mountains fall
And we come to end of days
In the dark I hear a call
Calling me there
I will go there
And back again
-Taken from Lord of the Rings.
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
Exchange rate
A fair exchange.
I think in this life, we are constantly exchanging things for something else that we want. Think barter trade. Think commerce and other biz terms, but to put it in a straightforward manner, we just like to exchange what we already have for the things we want. Sometimes, we also exchange things for things we don't want, not realising the importance of the exchange.
Like sometimes when I am unhappy, I do things because of my sadness not knowing that I am causing another person to be unhappy, thus spreading the unhappiness around, doubling it, making it worse. Not a good rate of exchange. Most workers exchange time and their skills for money, and exchange money for a better life, for things that sustain and propel them to greater heights, for less stress, for easier transport. Not to say that we have to spend each and every hour of our time doing something productive, that will lead to health problems that eventually we have to spend more time and effort doing something about it.
Exchange. If we view things we do as exchanges, some having greater impact than others, then it is wise not to attach emotional value to the things we do. After all, I have heard of people wanting to change job/scope/company but they slog on year after year. Why? Because of the comfort zone, their friendly colleagues, they have gotten used to wearing such and doing such that they are reluctant to leave even though they want to. I'm not discounting the importance or such deep relationships and memories, but this can be a factor that handicaps us in life. I respect those expats who can just relocate with a small suitcase of clothes and start all over again with almost nothing, no belongings, no things they are clinging to from another world. For me, I tend to be sentimental - It was with great reluctance that I parted with my Stussy bag I used to carry in secondary school during spring clean last 2 months. It has many memories for me. I still keep letters from friends, old christmas cards and etc. I can't relocate without bringing those things. But job wise for me, I think I can safely say that if a better opportunity comes along (which is very rare considering my position now) the exchange factor will be one of commerce for me.
==
That aside, there are 'must-dos' in every culture, specifically mine. My darling is irritated at me for calling some of his mannerisms 'low class' once in a while. It's not purposely meant to hurt... And I don't think I'm very 'high class' either but yeah, some things are must-dos, and others are 'boo-boos'. I've drawn up some fun rules for my life for myself to fulfill in my specific culture, here!
Must-dos for spiritedly
1.Remember all my covenantal friends birthdays!Wish them, pray for them, buy them a small token of appreciation! Makes everyone happy, and a small $5 gift is inexpensive when you see the look on the person's face that you remembered their birthdays.
2.I've received treats from managers and rich ones and people who love me enough to feed me, so many times that I actually save quite a lot on food. So, I will treat people to Starbucks or any little dessert, or a meal, when we meet.
3.Send flowers for any housewarming, office opening, new colleague, old colleague coming back that sort of thing. Once again inexpensive (if you go to the right places) and fun to give plus flowers are always appreciated. Next time a bottle of wine when I know how to choose them.
4. Set fun things that enable me to save money and actually spend on the things I really want. My rules are: I'm only going to buy one pair of jeans in a year. I don't really wear jeans so this rule is necessary. So I can get more dresses! Also health rule: Eat char kway teow twice a year only (adapted from Walt's code), drink fresh fruit juice whenever possible and just make healthier food options. Having 'no-lunch lunch' actually destresses my mind because I don't have to push and shove with the lunch crowd and queue and wait for seats, plus, I have time to relax in the office, catch up on admin (it's more fun to do it alone, silently) and sms people I love.
5.Always introduce myself to new people and make light banter with them.
6.Don't make shopping my favorite pasttime. So many of us just hang at shopping malls because it's convienient, non sweaty, and... we end up shopping which is not beneficial to any relationship! Let us go to parks, take long walks by beaches, chill out at quiet cafes, bookshops, and keep the romance alive. Movies are ok maybe once a fortnight for me.
7.Make yourself happy. Many people, myself included are too hard on ourselves. We make ourselves sad by our unrealised expectations, of cramming too many things in one day and not fulfilling all our agenda, of making plans and then having to cancel because of being overbooked then feel so guilty for disappointing others and ourselves. Well, the nervousness and tension only spills over. Relax and know that in one year's time you won't even remember what happened yesterday. I always give myself small treats when I've accomplished small tasks, and of course big treats for big tasks! Maybe a trip to JB or Batam will do us good, or a small little diamond accessory - even cases for handphones, a new Muji notebook, getting your favorite drink on the way to work. Simple things to keep life balanced and cheery!
8.Thank those who have gone out of their way 'beyond the call of duty' to help you in certain ways. Maybe those who have chaufeurred you without complain, give them a box of chocolates to show you care for their petrol costs. Those who have organized things, treat them to a refreshing drink. And those who have been your punching bag, your listening ear, your tireless support that have made you a success today, never fail to be that punching bag to some other person who will need you. Let's never be selfish with our time or resources, but don't just take and take, it's time to take turns to be giving too. I've learnt a lot, one year in The Office, and over the weekend I bought Manager a plush retro Mickey - she loves the Disney character. It's big, like a one year old baby, and able to sit down! I put it on her chair. When she realised it was for her she couldn't stop beaming and asked me why I gave that... And even talked to it, asking it to guard her seat as she went out for lunch. =) It costs a small amount but the value of an unexpected 'thanks for guiding me this one year', priceless!
I have more thoughts on this ( I realised mine is all related to treating and thanking)... actually when I was almost penniless, I thought hard about the facts of life and I vowed to make it up to all those people one day. My parents who brought me up, I wish I can buy an organic farm for them to happily live amongst the nature to a ripe old age. My friends who were there during the hard times, I want to treat them to double what they have so freely given. For God who is always there, I want to give and give to the pastors, to build the building, to be a vessel of blessing. I used to be quite selfish - or really, it's bo chup. And now, I actually still am quite nonchalant about the things happening in others' lives, etc. It's time to move out of that, as I approach another year! Goodbye old habits, I've learnt to be a better person!
I think in this life, we are constantly exchanging things for something else that we want. Think barter trade. Think commerce and other biz terms, but to put it in a straightforward manner, we just like to exchange what we already have for the things we want. Sometimes, we also exchange things for things we don't want, not realising the importance of the exchange.
Like sometimes when I am unhappy, I do things because of my sadness not knowing that I am causing another person to be unhappy, thus spreading the unhappiness around, doubling it, making it worse. Not a good rate of exchange. Most workers exchange time and their skills for money, and exchange money for a better life, for things that sustain and propel them to greater heights, for less stress, for easier transport. Not to say that we have to spend each and every hour of our time doing something productive, that will lead to health problems that eventually we have to spend more time and effort doing something about it.
Exchange. If we view things we do as exchanges, some having greater impact than others, then it is wise not to attach emotional value to the things we do. After all, I have heard of people wanting to change job/scope/company but they slog on year after year. Why? Because of the comfort zone, their friendly colleagues, they have gotten used to wearing such and doing such that they are reluctant to leave even though they want to. I'm not discounting the importance or such deep relationships and memories, but this can be a factor that handicaps us in life. I respect those expats who can just relocate with a small suitcase of clothes and start all over again with almost nothing, no belongings, no things they are clinging to from another world. For me, I tend to be sentimental - It was with great reluctance that I parted with my Stussy bag I used to carry in secondary school during spring clean last 2 months. It has many memories for me. I still keep letters from friends, old christmas cards and etc. I can't relocate without bringing those things. But job wise for me, I think I can safely say that if a better opportunity comes along (which is very rare considering my position now) the exchange factor will be one of commerce for me.
==
That aside, there are 'must-dos' in every culture, specifically mine. My darling is irritated at me for calling some of his mannerisms 'low class' once in a while. It's not purposely meant to hurt... And I don't think I'm very 'high class' either but yeah, some things are must-dos, and others are 'boo-boos'. I've drawn up some fun rules for my life for myself to fulfill in my specific culture, here!
Must-dos for spiritedly
1.Remember all my covenantal friends birthdays!Wish them, pray for them, buy them a small token of appreciation! Makes everyone happy, and a small $5 gift is inexpensive when you see the look on the person's face that you remembered their birthdays.
2.I've received treats from managers and rich ones and people who love me enough to feed me, so many times that I actually save quite a lot on food. So, I will treat people to Starbucks or any little dessert, or a meal, when we meet.
3.Send flowers for any housewarming, office opening, new colleague, old colleague coming back that sort of thing. Once again inexpensive (if you go to the right places) and fun to give plus flowers are always appreciated. Next time a bottle of wine when I know how to choose them.
4. Set fun things that enable me to save money and actually spend on the things I really want. My rules are: I'm only going to buy one pair of jeans in a year. I don't really wear jeans so this rule is necessary. So I can get more dresses! Also health rule: Eat char kway teow twice a year only (adapted from Walt's code), drink fresh fruit juice whenever possible and just make healthier food options. Having 'no-lunch lunch' actually destresses my mind because I don't have to push and shove with the lunch crowd and queue and wait for seats, plus, I have time to relax in the office, catch up on admin (it's more fun to do it alone, silently) and sms people I love.
5.Always introduce myself to new people and make light banter with them.
6.Don't make shopping my favorite pasttime. So many of us just hang at shopping malls because it's convienient, non sweaty, and... we end up shopping which is not beneficial to any relationship! Let us go to parks, take long walks by beaches, chill out at quiet cafes, bookshops, and keep the romance alive. Movies are ok maybe once a fortnight for me.
7.Make yourself happy. Many people, myself included are too hard on ourselves. We make ourselves sad by our unrealised expectations, of cramming too many things in one day and not fulfilling all our agenda, of making plans and then having to cancel because of being overbooked then feel so guilty for disappointing others and ourselves. Well, the nervousness and tension only spills over. Relax and know that in one year's time you won't even remember what happened yesterday. I always give myself small treats when I've accomplished small tasks, and of course big treats for big tasks! Maybe a trip to JB or Batam will do us good, or a small little diamond accessory - even cases for handphones, a new Muji notebook, getting your favorite drink on the way to work. Simple things to keep life balanced and cheery!
8.Thank those who have gone out of their way 'beyond the call of duty' to help you in certain ways. Maybe those who have chaufeurred you without complain, give them a box of chocolates to show you care for their petrol costs. Those who have organized things, treat them to a refreshing drink. And those who have been your punching bag, your listening ear, your tireless support that have made you a success today, never fail to be that punching bag to some other person who will need you. Let's never be selfish with our time or resources, but don't just take and take, it's time to take turns to be giving too. I've learnt a lot, one year in The Office, and over the weekend I bought Manager a plush retro Mickey - she loves the Disney character. It's big, like a one year old baby, and able to sit down! I put it on her chair. When she realised it was for her she couldn't stop beaming and asked me why I gave that... And even talked to it, asking it to guard her seat as she went out for lunch. =) It costs a small amount but the value of an unexpected 'thanks for guiding me this one year', priceless!
I have more thoughts on this ( I realised mine is all related to treating and thanking)... actually when I was almost penniless, I thought hard about the facts of life and I vowed to make it up to all those people one day. My parents who brought me up, I wish I can buy an organic farm for them to happily live amongst the nature to a ripe old age. My friends who were there during the hard times, I want to treat them to double what they have so freely given. For God who is always there, I want to give and give to the pastors, to build the building, to be a vessel of blessing. I used to be quite selfish - or really, it's bo chup. And now, I actually still am quite nonchalant about the things happening in others' lives, etc. It's time to move out of that, as I approach another year! Goodbye old habits, I've learnt to be a better person!
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Food.
Food for thought. Read a quote attributed to Albert Eintstein:
There are two ways to live your life -one as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle.
Cool. Hum I must be more balanced in my purchases. Buy more skincare and wellness products to even out my huge consumption of spiritedly stuff - obscure knickknacks that junk up my room, clothes, bag, small things... I have soooo many things to sell at the flea mart.
I wonder why women love shopping so much. I only shop when I have things to buy. Then again, the things on my list are so many that I can't possibly finish buying... well, I can, but it doesn't give me a sense of satisfaction anyways.
Was explaining IDENTITY to my girls the other day. Tried to draw it out - One's identity is shaped by the Ego, or ID as learnt in psychoanlysis with Freud and the big boys, which leads to your psyche - heart issues, better known as psychology. For me I feel personality and character is not one and the same, though in descriptive writing one would be hard pressed to use adjectives to bring out the differences. And, of course the all important outlook - appearance, what you choose to wear sort of determines your behavior. Really! Somehow the vibe created is not that simple especially if you are a complex creature, you will never ever find something to wear that is 100% YOU. Sure, I like asymetric, designer stuff with bold prints and grafitti style tees. But I also like fragile, white, almost transluscent flowy loose dresses and blouses as well as sharp, chic stuff. More importantly it has to have utility - who designed girls trousers without pockets is really... sigh. Why, the extra padding makes the hips look bigger? Now that I have short(er) hair I want to be more bold and daring. At least I don't look that unkempt now though I still don't comb my hair.
I think that one day I'd just be my own person. Finally find out the things I want to do, do them, make enough money to last a long,long time, and then go somewhere where the air is fresh, organic food is the norm, where I can eat bread and cheese all day without any hype about weight loss, unhealthy fads, or have the urge to go shopping daily just to beat the boredom.
Oh and I ordered my favorite chocolate eclairs for the BBQ. Yumyum.
There are two ways to live your life -one as though nothing is a miracle, the other is as though everything is a miracle.
Cool. Hum I must be more balanced in my purchases. Buy more skincare and wellness products to even out my huge consumption of spiritedly stuff - obscure knickknacks that junk up my room, clothes, bag, small things... I have soooo many things to sell at the flea mart.
I wonder why women love shopping so much. I only shop when I have things to buy. Then again, the things on my list are so many that I can't possibly finish buying... well, I can, but it doesn't give me a sense of satisfaction anyways.
Was explaining IDENTITY to my girls the other day. Tried to draw it out - One's identity is shaped by the Ego, or ID as learnt in psychoanlysis with Freud and the big boys, which leads to your psyche - heart issues, better known as psychology. For me I feel personality and character is not one and the same, though in descriptive writing one would be hard pressed to use adjectives to bring out the differences. And, of course the all important outlook - appearance, what you choose to wear sort of determines your behavior. Really! Somehow the vibe created is not that simple especially if you are a complex creature, you will never ever find something to wear that is 100% YOU. Sure, I like asymetric, designer stuff with bold prints and grafitti style tees. But I also like fragile, white, almost transluscent flowy loose dresses and blouses as well as sharp, chic stuff. More importantly it has to have utility - who designed girls trousers without pockets is really... sigh. Why, the extra padding makes the hips look bigger? Now that I have short(er) hair I want to be more bold and daring. At least I don't look that unkempt now though I still don't comb my hair.
I think that one day I'd just be my own person. Finally find out the things I want to do, do them, make enough money to last a long,long time, and then go somewhere where the air is fresh, organic food is the norm, where I can eat bread and cheese all day without any hype about weight loss, unhealthy fads, or have the urge to go shopping daily just to beat the boredom.
Oh and I ordered my favorite chocolate eclairs for the BBQ. Yumyum.
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